ADHD Symptoms in Adults

ADHD Humor: You Know You Have ADHD When…

…you read the last page of a book first because you can’t wait to find out how it ends, or you hunt for your cell phone while you’re talking on it…

Lost keys on house of floor a sign of ADHD.

We asked, “You know you have ADHD when…” and you shared these funny, sad, and poignant ADHDisms. Read. Share. Enjoy. Here’s to living well with — and finding humor in — attention deficit hyperactivity disorder!

1. You can’t find your car keys or your spare set, and your husband is hesitant to lend you his keys because you will probably misplace those, too. (And, you agree, he may be right!)
—Kathy Zimovan, South Carolina

2. You can’t see your alarm clock on the nightstand because of the stack of books you’re reading  all at the same time.
—Stan Herring, Birmingham, Alabama

3. You buy another organizing system, to organize your last five organizing systems.
—Letta Neely, Boston, Massachusetts

4. You look for your eyeglasses, and they are sitting on top of your head, or you find the remote control for the DVD player in the refrigerator.
—Melissa, Hampton, New Jersey

5. You can’t see over the piles of paper in your office, but when someone asks you for a document, you say, “Oh, that is in this pile.”
—Rebecca Chadwick, Wyomissing, Pennsylvania

[Free Download: The Funny Side of Living with ADHD]

6. You forget what you were doing in the middle of taking a shower!
—Angela Kohlbrecher, Breezy Point, New York

7. You stop at a stop sign, sit there, and stare at the sign, waiting for it to turn green.
—Dennis Murdock, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada

8. Your students remind you of what you were talking about before you were distracted by one of them sneezing.
—Rebecca Taylor, High Point, North Carolina

9. While considering your answer to a question, you wonder what’s for supper.
—Cindy, Chicopee, Massachusetts

10. The person sitting beside you grabs your attention, but so does the heating unit shutting on and off, the fluorescent light flickering above you, and a bird flying by the window!
—Kimberly Zimmerman, Kansas

[Hosting a Dinner Party When You Have ADHD—What Could Go Wrong?]

11. I’m sorry. What was the question again?
—An ADDitude Reader

12. Going shopping takes three attempts.
—Syrah, ADDitudemag.com forums member

13. You have enough money in the bank to pay bills, yet you simply forget to!
—Nancy, ADDitudemag.com forums member

14. You’re talking on the phone and have a moment of panic where you ask, “Where is my phone!?!” and tell the person on the other end of the line that you’ve lost your phone.
—roneydapony, ADDitudemag.com forums member

15. You lose something you need…and you haven’t moved from your seat.

16. You wonder about the weird sound “everyone else’s” cars are making, only to realize, 15 minutes down the road, that you’ve been driving with your parking brake on!
—Courey, ADDitudemag.com forums member

17. You dial a number, but, by the time someone answers, you forget who you’re calling.
—stew4aa, ADDitudemag.com forums member

18. You realize you have five years’ worth of Christmas cards nicely printed, stuffed, addressed, and never mailed!
—kan65, ADDitudemag.com forums member

19. Your spouse asks you for a cup of water and you go and make a peanut butter sandwich for yourself…
—JD, ADDitudemag.com forums member

20. You spend almost an hour looking for your favorite watch, give up, and grab another watch. After you pull up your long sleeve to put the watch on, you stare for a few minutes because your favorite watch is already on your hand.
—Adsartha, ADDitudemag.com forums member

21. You start cleaning the kitchen…and find something that belongs in the office. You go to the office to put it away, sit down to check your e-mail, go on Facebook instead, decide to write a poem, and several hours later realize that the water in the sink is cold.
—wifemomstudent, ADDitudemag.com forums member

22. You leave with enough time to be early for your ADHD doctor’s appointment, but are thinking of other things and drive to work instead and end up late.
—Graceful Dave, ADDitudemag.com forums member

23. You would rather have your purse stolen than your planner! You can replace the stuff in your purse — it would be a hassle, but it can be done. But your planner — that’s your life!
—Wander, ADDitudemag.com forums member

24. You lose your son in your house. You were busy going through paperwork, when you absent-mindedly put your 20 month-old son down for a nap. Ten minutes later you come into the living room where your son normally is playing and don’t see him. You panic and yell, “I lost Jacob! I lost Jacob!” Your neighbor comes running to your apartment, with phone in hand, ready to dial 911, but she finds your son sound asleep in his bed.
—rozie, ADDitudemag.com forums member

25. You drain the can of soup you just opened for lunch.
—spazmom, ADDitudemag.com forums member

[You Probably Have ADHD If…]

66 Comments & Reviews

  1. my favorite is always, (because its so true lol)

    If someone else in the house is missing something like a remote the first three places they check are the refrigerator, the cupboard and the only room in the house without a tv.

  2. You accidentally take your dog’s medicine instead of your own.

    You’re reading and brushing your teeth with electric bush and suddenly the brush is wrapped up in your long hair..

  3. When you finally sit down to focus & it takes you a solid twenty minutes to finally type out an important text message reply when someone has been blowing up your phone all day for a response, only to forget to send it.

  4. You know you have ADD when you need to remember something so you write it down and then a week later you realize that you forgot to look at what you wrote down and find it underneath a pile of stuff

  5. When reading this message reminded you that you’re daughter’s ADHD evaluation from the psychiatrist has been sitting on the counter for a month and the teacher has to fill it in within the next week.

  6. Re #6: I was once taking a shower and was very tired. I put my hands on my eyes to rinse my face, and then wondered who turned the light off! That convinced me that I really can’t afford to miss on sleep.

  7. You walk on the court for your first ever state tournament tennis match and start your warm up in your flip flops bc you forgot to put on your tennis shoes, only realizing it when your opponent finally asks if you’re playing in flip flops!

  8. You go to put your latest project on the dining table, but realise that the twenty projects that are started, but not finished, have filled the table top.

  9. When you go to log in to add a comment then get frustrated that the website won’t accept your password…only to realize you’ve never actually registered with the website before…

  10. When you go to use the public toilets at the shops and start undoing your belt long before you get there, because you’ve forgotten you are not at home…

  11. When you sit at your laptop listening to YouTube with one earphone plugged in, while the earphone in the other ear is connected to your phone because you’re also browsing Facebook…

  12. When you’re super grateful that your kids have made it to the ages of 4 and 9, without any dramatic incidents caused by your chronic distraction and forgetfulness…(do I really need an official diagnosis? lol)

  13. Walking outbof the house, locking it, getting to your car, can’t find your keys, walk back to your house, find them still in your door because you needed to check you had your wallet, so you open the door because you realized you forgot to shave, shave, walk out of the house but now cant find your keys to lock the front door, find them next to your bathroom sink, walk down to your car, start the car, get halfway to work when you realize why the freeway is so open today….it’s Saturday! Ugh.

    1. Then decide seeing as you’re out you might as well go shopping for that thing you saw in the catalog and badly need…today. might as well buy some breakfast on the way seeing as you don’t normally have time for it. Spend an hour eating breakfast because you were checking your emails on your phone. Have a wonderful day browsing the stores only to get back to the car at store closing time, feeling really elated because you managed to make it to that store that sold the item you so badly needed – you bought it just before they closed! Get home totally exhausted, dump all the shopping in the family room to sort out later, to remember all the jobs you planned to do today…I always thought tomorrow would be the better day for them.

  14. You forget where you park your car no matter where you go or how often you park there — work, church, the mall, the grocery store, the airport, you name it.

    1. My solution to lost cars is to park on the far side of a carpark, away from everyone else. This usually makes it easier to find.
      When workmates say “why don’t you just arrive at work before everyone else like me, and park closer” you just roll your eyes and think “Where do I start? No, don’t even try”

  15. Going to see my Doctor and getting a referral to see an ADD specialist. Pleased that I have made a step in the right direction. Keep meaning to book appointment, finally get it together then realise I’ve lost the referral letter. Make the call of shame to my Doctor and ask for another letter. Cry.

  16. When you go to the cleaners to drop off some shirts and pick up some others, and you do the drop off, pay for the clean ones and don’t realize until you get home that you left the clean shirts (that you paid for!) hanging by the register at the cleaners.

  17. When you go to post a comment on a website and realize that you are not signed in…
    You try to sign in but can’t remember your password.
    You search for your password and realize that it doesn’t actually exist because you have not created an account yet.
    You create an account and then pop over to your email to verify it.
    You can’t find the email you were looking for but this other one looks kinda important…you should probably answer it now.
    You start to answer the email and realize you need to attach a photo.
    You search all over your computer to locate the photo and realize that it needs to be cropped.
    You spend… who knows how long cropping and editing and organizing all your photos.
    You start to drift into sleep…
    WAKE UP!
    Give up on cropping photos and go to check your email.
    Realize that you were in the middle of composing an email and need to attach the photo.
    Repeat, out loud and to yourself, “attach the photo, attach the photo” so that you won’t forget what you’re supposed to be doing.
    You attach the photo and then check the rest of your mail.
    You discover the email for verifying the account you created on that website and click the link.
    Now which article was it that you were going to comment on? How are you ever going to find it again?
    Oh, there it is!

    1. Love it! Sometimes after 2 hours of doing who knows what on the computer I sit there blankly staring at it wondering why I was on my computer to begin with! And my husband wants to know what I’m doing the whole time I’m awak till 4 am and I can’t even show him one thing accomplished or finished then i wonder what the heck did I do for these 4 hours???

  18. You step in the shower shampoo your hair , continue showering and think of that report due this morning and then remember you need to book your holiday trip,wasnt Cuba a great trip last year, That musical group in the local square, turn off the shower, dry yourself off, and then step over to the mirror and see you didnt rinse your hair.

  19. U-Turns are a way of life and you miss your exit to go home but don’t realize it for 5 miles,so it is an 18 mile round trip to get back. BTW – I just sat at a stop sign and waited for the light to change last week while taking my granddaughter and her boyfriend to lunch…

      1. Lol! I’ve done that!

        When you run out of gas, walk to the gas station, bring a gallon of gas back, pour it in your tank, drive away and a favorite song comes on the radio, you then run out of gas again because you forgot to stop at the next closest gas station to fill up

  20. When you are driving, but can’t figure out why or where you are going. To finally remember where and immediately think, but I need to go get… To finally start chanting to yourself the intended destination, trying to remember if you looked at the light before you started your turn.

  21. You go to the first window in the drive-thru and pay for your order and then drive right past the second window to pick up your order since there was no one else in front of you.

  22. Go into the gas station to pay for gas. Have about a 10 minute pleasant conversation with the cashier. Go back out to your car and drive away without pumping your gas…. get down the road about 2 miles and wonder why your car is still almost on empty!

  23. Have a mini panic attack every time you lock and shut your car door because you MIGHT have forgotten to grab your keys and have locked yourself out… again. I like to call this phenomenon; ADHDPTSD

    1. Oh my gosh haha! ADHDPTSD – that is *the* best secondary diagnosis I have ever heard. I have adhdptsd over sooo many things 😂 nice one buddy! *high-5’s you*
      I love it hehe, this made me smile 😊 thanks for that, I really needed it ☺️👌🏻💖

  24. Heres a few more, because its making me feel better after a rough ADHD day:

    You burn steamed vegetables. Twice in a row.

    You spend 15 minutes trying to figure out why your computer wont turn on, only to realize the power is out because you forgot to pay the bill again.

    People who live with you usually cant find anything where it belongs and are constantly finding things where they DONT belong… Like power drill bits in the silverware drawer, moldy bowls of cereal on the nightstand, and dirty paintbrushes in a rag on the side of the bathtub.

  25. Unfortunately, not only have I sat at a stop sign, waiting for it to turn green, I once made a complete and legal stop and then turned left…. at a red light! But only once, praise God, and no traffic as it was late at night.

  26. You are at work and receive an email from ADDitude magazine, click on a link about “ADHD Humor,” and then spend time reading the article, all of the comments, and then decide to add your own comment. Only you have to log in to make a comment, so you spend 10 minutes trying to figure out where in your office junk drawer you wrote down your ADDitude magazine username and password.

  27. When you go for your driving test and drive really slowly out of the test centre, to then be told by the examiner I may want to release the handbrake….

  28. When you’re on your way to a solid complaint/reprimand but stop yourself first and ask the other person if you asked/told them out loud to do something, or just thought in your head that you needed to ask/tell them.

    Luckily my 8 year old has not caught on to this being a way to get away with something yet! :p

  29. You never ever run out of clutter , you have about five magazine subscriptions . All of them in clutter and you have not read any one of them…. because you’re too busy doing other things And you will get to it later. More than a years’ worth

  30. When you accidentally set your piece of paper that has your school essay written on it on fire by placing it on top of a candle that you forgot was there

  31. When you are following your real estate agent to view another home and you forget what you are doing and just drive home. You realize your error when the real estate agent texts you the address of the next home to see.

  32. When you’ve been sitting stil for a very long and frustrating time and you finally get to run while seated. Those legged are just a going a hundred miles an hour and then you are rewarded with a blast of euphoria. You feel so good while down the row everyone is looking at you cross eyed and you just keep on running…..in your chair. Can you spell relief? Fidgeting = endorphin!

  33. When you are in a meeting and it is so boring you want to stand up, scream, and jump through a window. It’s honestly not that far to the ground.

  34. When you get so meta with your ADHD that you recognize your recent whirlwind of organizational activity is ACTUALLY your anxiety fumbling around with various attempts at executive functions in order to deal with (insert overwhelming task here), then decide to confront your anxiety head on by looking up ways to do (insert overwhelming task here) efficiently…

    …resulting in an 8 hour internet wormhole that has just become your NEW method of stress related avoidance. Realizing this, you grit your teeth and refocus your efforts on finding ways to deal with executive function issues more efficiently…with a NEW internet search…

  35. You know you have ADHD when you let the dogs outside, let them back inside the house, and you have no memory of allowing them back in, so you panic and start looking for them outside, but the dogs are sitting in their beds in the house.

  36. I sit down to update the website so that people can finally begin to register and pay for an event that’s coming up in only 2 months. I have only 3 hours to spare right now! I only need to add the paypal link, and a registration form. But I see that the site banner is boring and very outdated, so open adobe illustrator to make a new one. It will need images, so I open explorer to see what I have, and the images are all huge, they need to be cropped and shrunk, so I open photoshop to edit them. An hour has passed. I create a banner I’m happy with, (90 minutes have passed, and I still need to shower, too) and decide to convert the file to an image to use on the website (because easier), but find that illustrator won’t save as an image file (what the…?) And then find my version of photoshop won’t open illustrator’s file. I google it (black hole alert!), and 30 minutes later find a free software to fix this (2+ hours have passed) so download. 20 minutes later, I realize I’ve succumbed yet again to mission-creep (shocking!), and go to the paypal site to make an “add-to-cart” button, and take too long doing it, and paypal makes me start over. (grrrrr!) (3 hours gone…) I go to google to create the google-form to use for registration, and…. Late, yet again. Mantra: avoid mission-creep. Avoid mission-creep. Repeat. 😁

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