Emotions & Shame

It’s OK to Treat Yourself!

Low self-esteem triggered by ADHD can condition us to settle for second-best. But don’t let a lack of confidence prevent you from reaching for what you want — and what you deserve.

A woman suffering under the weight of many shopping bags, in a silent mall
young woman female shopper standing with colorful paper bags in hands in shopping mall or department store, focus on hands

I was going to buy a box of pudding pops in the grocery store the other night. But as I reached into the freezer case, I noticed they cost $4.99. I thought, “They should cost $3,” and put them back.

Why couldn’t I buy the pops? Probably because the thing I wanted was staring me in the face, and having it was too much to comprehend. As someone with ADHD, I’m certain you do the same thing.

There’s something that you want, deep down, but it takes a bit more investment to procure or to achieve than you had anticipated. It could be a thing, but it could also be getting together with an old friend who makes you feel happy, updating your resume, or learning to knit.

[“I’m Not Ashamed of My ADHD Anymore”]

If you’re like me, you probably have an impressive track record of starting and not finishing things, and the low confidence that comes along with it. So you don’t work on your resume because employers won’t hire you anyway, or bother to call your friend.

With attention deficit, it’s easy to accept second best. We’re used to everything being harder for us than for people without ADHD. But don’t use your ADHD to justify not trying to achieve something that you want. If you do, you’re like the lady who shivers in the frozen foods aisle as she tries to justify spending an extra $2 for something that will keep her happy for a week.

Excerpted from the blog ADD-Libbing.