School’s out for the summer, the kids are sleeping in, and my new morning routine is bittersweet.
Yesterday was Aaron and Natalie’s last day of school. This morning, I woke up to my alarm at 7:10 — and Nat didn’t! She stayed asleep (on my favorite pillows, on my side of my bed) where she’d appeared in the middle of the night. “I’m scared,” she’d said, and fell right back to sleep.
With Nat still asleep, I took a longer shower. I didn’t have to worry that she was squeezing the life out of Smokey, our cat.
With Nat still asleep, I had time to put on jewelry. I wasn’t redirecting her to get dressed. (“Shoes — think only about your shoes. Put the toy down. Natalie! Focus! Find your shoes!”)
With Natalie still asleep, I had time to make coffee. I wasn’t packing up her lunch, then repacking it after she took everything out of her lunch bag to look at it, and left it spread out on the living room floor!
With Natalie still asleep, I sat down for 10 minutes, waiting for Krista, our summer babysitter, to arrive. I drank some coffee. I ate some toast. I wasn’t looking for Natalie’s glasses, combing her hair, repacking her backpack.
Ahhhh. Paradise. I’ll savor these summer mornings! For now, but not forever.
After all, with Nat still sleep, I went to work without a kiss. Without a hug. Without hearing “I love you, Mommy.” And without saying “I love you” back.
Is it time to go home yet?
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Updated on June 15, 2021