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"Stop Pushing Your Kid to Be Normal"

We all do it whether we know it or not — pushing our kids into the box of normalization. The problem is, it never ends well.

2 Comments: "Stop Pushing Your Kid to Be Normal"

  1. As a former spouse of a person with ADD and mother of a child with ADD, I have to agree AND disagree. Whilst the bashing and constant criticism «  you are lazy » « you could do better » is destructive, gentle but insistent shoving in the right direction, rather then giving in to fate, is not wrong in my world. The joy my son shows when he brings home good grades is invaluable. Because HE wants it. Sure, he cannot plan a work schedule. Sure, I have to put up with his frustration and outbursts when I have him comply to the schedules I draw up, and his transient dispair hurts me, too. Sure, I comfort him «  yeah it’s harder for you, and that is unfair. But you can do it, with the right help and with your strong will». There is tricks- i pasted labels with the french name of things all over the house, since dryly learning vocabular doesn’t work. You want a bowl? Read its name. Once. But every time you use said bowl. And it works. Would you not insist on a blind child learning to read braille? And when it comes to his emotions, well there is nothing wrong with them. But he has to learn how not to hurt others, because he needs friends. And friends are not those who just forgive you everything because of your condition. It’s those who challenge you. He doesn’t need to fit in a box. But he DOES need to live up to his potential. And it’s work, for him, and for me. .

  2. 💔
    I can’t put into words how I feel as one of those kids who is now 38 and experiencing the exact same expectations (from my parents and work environments), after all these years.
    ADD/Inattentive type ADHD diagnosed 30 years ago.

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