Dear ADDitude

Making Friends In High School

“I used to be pretty bossy. I’m in the ninth grade now, and I’ve matured a lot, but I still don’t have friends. Do you have any advice?”

First, let me assure you that you’re not alone. Many of my teen patients tell me how “left out” they feel at school. It sounds like the kids at school haven’t given you a second chance.

Find time to “be with” a group so they can recognize how you’ve changed. It’s always easier to talk to people when you share interests, so get involved with clubs or activities at school or in your community. One of my teen patients joined his school band. Another became friends with other riders at a (horse) stable.

Remember, to have a good friend, you must be a good friend.

Related resources