My Forum Comments
Thanks allisonkoster. This is really helpful. Also thanks for the acknowledgement of ADHD being real (in your last sentence). Because my testing didn’t come out as me showing ADHD tendencies, sometimes I have wondered if I’m just trying to pin a label on myself– like, making it up to justify my limitations and feelings of deficiency.
This thread is a godsend to me– to know that I’m not the rare bird whose behavior defies diagnosi
s. And glad that I now have a direction to pursue if I really want to go out and try to get the diagnosis. cynzav.79, thanks for initiating this discussion topic.
I had some lengthy testing done by a neuro-psychologist and the conclusion was that I don’t have indicators for ADHD. The Dr. said it’s anxiety. (I’ve had anxiety all my life, lessening over time because I’ve learned what self-care is and improve in that over time). So my thought was “oh great, I’ve been working on the anxiety for many years and I’ve still got these problems. What’s wrong with me that I can’t work out this anxiety enough to live a functional life”. (my ADHD is the inattentive kind). There goes my hope of finding answers and solutions.”
I’ve played over and over in my mind… OCD? Autism maybe? But not thinking ADHD, until Jessica McCabe’s TEDX Talk appeared on my Facebook newsfeed. When I listened to that, and each video she has made, pieces starting falling together and I could see how I could change my space and lifestyle to help me function better.
I don’t know why the test didn’t detect it, except that I’m sure I was in hyperfocus during the test– so maybe that’s why it didn’t pick up on it (????) Just my theory.
January 12, 2018 at 7:29 am in reply to: ADD and redundant/lengthy explanations drive me crazy! Anyone else? #73380
- This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by sss.
Makes me crazy too. UNLESS I believe the person is verbally processing. Especially with elderly people. The elderly are sometimes engaged in the profound “development” task of replaying their memories repeatedly, and from different angles, to explore meaning in the life they lived, and come to peace with it. Sometimes it’s interesting, sometimes boring and I get antsy– either way I count i a priviledge to be part of that. Of course as with anything, sometimes it’s necessary to press the pause button. Same with the people I am close to… I like to get clarification– “it’s not a topic I’m particularly interested in, let’s talk about something else UNLESS you’re needing to process. If it’s that I’m here for you, if not, I want to move on.”
If the person is not elderly, not close to me, and it’s just their communication style, I do my best to excuse myself from that kind of convo. What I like to do is ask personal questions. In that case they will either want to end the conversation, or will talk about something that I’m more interested in (the internal stuff).
Or if they’re giving me directions or instructions, I put my hand up, smile and say “I got it… I got it”.
Not always easy, not always successful. If it’s not working I take a deep breath. If my head is filling up and I feel “done” then I just let the awkward annoyance happen– “I said I’m done and I really mean it” or whatever thing, usually can’t think of a diplomatic ending there, maybe it’s something for me to work on. But if someone doesn’t get it, I’d rather be awkward than to suffer through it. I used to suffer through everything, now that I’ve become acquainted with boundaries I’m more willing to act on my impatience, otherwise it takes a big emotional toll on me.