Ellings4

My Forum Comments

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  • in reply to: Living with ADHD and Dyslexia #76730
    Ellings4
    Participant

    I have ADHD and dyslexia as well. The struggles are real.

    3 things that have been helping me lately:

    1. I heard an expert describe focusing better when moving, and also focusing better while talking (vs. interacting with text). So, I’ve been trying this out at work. I take a walk at lunchtime and dictate to my phone while walking (I use the google doc app). When I get back, I only need to edit the document and organize it. This is much easier than sitting in front of a blank document and typing. (and it just looks like I’m exercising and talking to a friend on the phone, so that’s a normal lunch activity)

    2. I have discovered a great book and podcast! They take you step by step along the journey to work with your ADHD not against it. It’s great! https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/adult-adhd-add-tips-and-support/id988935339?mt=2 (This also relates to the many people on this thread who would like to transition to making a living with their creativity e.g. the episode from Sept. 19, 2015 – but you should listen chronologically and give it a chance because it takes them a few episodes to get good at doing them).

    3. Medication for ADHD is helping my dyslexia. One of my challenges with reading/writing/language is very weak working memory. It’s hard to pull up words for things. It’s hard to write the second half of a sentence because I can’t remember the first half. etc. I has been hard to find meds that work for me, but as I’m getting closer I see that they really help with all this kind of stuff!

    Good luck everyone!!

    in reply to: Post-Adderall Crash #76731
    Ellings4
    Participant

    Thanks, Penny!

    Is there a way to post general topics? – I wondered if I should post this in the kids section instead of adults.

    I’ve had worse luck with methylphenidates so I’m hoping to figure this rebound part out for amphetamines.

    It seems like there are two stages before it wears off: 1) working well, then 2) rebound (headaches, eyes weird, exhausted but still mentally revved up, etc), and after that, it seems to actually be out of my system but I was still having trouble falling asleep. On the short-acting amphetamines, it’s about 5 hours that it works and 5 more of the rebound symptoms.

    Researching and experimenting since when I initially posted this, I’ve learned one thing:
    I wasn’t able to fall asleep till sometimes 3 or 4am. But it seems like if I took the short-acting one at 8am, at 3 am it can’t be because it is still in my system. Instead, I’m starting to think that it is because I’m too tired to get to sleep on time. I generally have trouble falling asleep if I stay up too late and am too tired. The rebound symptoms make it hard to do the things I have to do before going to bed. Even brushing my teeth feels like an insurmountable challenge to getting to bed – so I was staying up later. So I’ve been trying to make sure I get to bed earlier those nights and it’s been helping with not being able to fall asleep.

    I’d still love any advice on how to reduce the other rebound symptoms though!

    Thanks!!

    in reply to: Teen admittedly quit trying at school #76648
    Ellings4
    Participant

    In addition to other good things you’re doing… another concept that sounds like it would really help your son (and most of the students I’ve taught) is something that isn’t unique to ADHD… it’s the concept of “growth” and “fixed” mindsets. Ned Hallowell said something to the effect that this concept is the most important contribution from psychology in a really long time (wish I could remember and quote it better). People can easily slip into feeling that “smart” or “stupid” are fixed traits of a person… something that you’re born with that there is no ability to change. So why work hard if this is just a fact about you… the harder you work the more it hurts to fail. If you know you didn’t try, it protects you a bit from the pain of failing. Anyway, I think teaching kids (and ourselves) to shift to a “growth mindset” (explained in the podcast below) is key to happiness in life and effectiveness in school. What you’re describing with your son sounds like bullies and other brain chemistry stuff are for sure playing a role in making it harder to try and more painful to fail…but the hopelessness and giving up that you describe sound like classic symptoms of a “fixed mindset”.
    Here’s a great podcast from Ned Hallowell on this topic. They are discussing 3rd graders, but I have seen great change in the college students I teach with these same techniques – I’m sure it applies at any age.
    Good luck!
    https://www.acast.com/distractionwithdrnedhallowell/s2-ep30-achieve-more-with-a-growth-mindset

    in reply to: $1200 for diagnosis?!? #76711
    Ellings4
    Participant

    I think sometimes the long & involved expensive diagnosis is required to get school accommodations (but hopefully the student doesn’t pay for it).

    For regular folks looking for a diagnosis and meds, the cost should just be the normal cost of an appointment with a psychiatrist or an MD. In an hour, they ask you a bunch of questions and decided if they think that is the best direction to go – it can be less than satisfying, especially if the person doesn’t seem very knowledgeable about ADHD. I needed to be convinced more, so I went to a psychologist who specializes in ADHD and took home surveys for me and my family to fill out independently. Then in a second appointment, we went over the surveys and he convinced me that I had ADHD and that I had a lot to gain by understanding it better. But a psychologist can’t prescribe drugs, so then I started working with a psychiatrist (could have gone to an MD as well). The psychiatrist didn’t need to see the diagnosis from the psychologist, they did their own 1/2 hour of questions, and made sure to rule out other things like bipolar.

    in reply to: Mental Load, Feminism, and ADD #73953
    Ellings4
    Participant

    bec1124 points out that although she and her husband ended up running their household with quite traditional gender roles, she felt loved and respected for her work. Their relationship felt fair – both worked hard and communicated an appreciation for the work of the other, they made an effort to make their relationship and their love a priority and to forgive each other and work to make it better when the balance wasn’t quite fair. She says “he loved me and we tried to work at it together”. This sounds like feminism to me. It’s not people doing exactly the same role, but people both contributing as equals towards a shared goal in ways they decide suit them best. We can suggest that she may have the definition of feminism wrong, as some replies did, but not shame her for her decision. It sounds like it was a wonderful relationship because of respect, good communication, and a commitment to working together to make sure it stayed fair.
    I think the take-home message of many of these posts (and the original cartoon) hinge on good communication. Don’t assume it’s fair based on your perception, you may not be aware of what the other person is actually doing (like the mental load). But also that you have to take ownership of finding out how balanced it is and be willing to up your game if you find out it is lopsided towards the other person.

    My question for the group is, any tips for sharing the mental load? The comic says she decided it’s easier for her just to do it herself…
    Sharing it requires a coordinated effort… which is hard enough without ADHD.

    in reply to: Trouble Getting a Diagnosis #72974
    Ellings4
    Participant

    Hi Cynthia,
    I wrote you a long reply and I think it disappeared…
    The summary is probably better than the long ramble.
    Basically, you say you’re a masters student.
    Your college/university should have a disability resource center (sometimes called different names – disabled student services etc…)
    If you are an enrolled student they should be able to provide you with guidance through this process of getting diagnosed and trying medication and other support tools. They may even have a support group for students on campus for accountability and learning study and life strategies.
    Sometimes they pay for diagnosis and/or testing or do it in-house. Even if they can’t help you on campus, they are usually connected to folks in the community who work with students with ADHD and who their students have had good experiences with.
    I missed out on this because I figured this out right after graduating, but I still was given recommendations of what psychologists and psychiatrists in town were good and really well educated on ADHD – not just that stereotype version.
    In addition to getting accommodations to help you with your master’s program, these offices are usually a very good place to get started on the diagnosis process. Of course, how good they are varies by university and by the person you actually talk to, but they are generally a really good resource and place to start.

    in reply to: Diagnosis #72566
    Ellings4
    Participant

    Hi Cynthia,
    You say you’re a masters student… have you gone to talk to your school’s disability resource center?
    It seems that there are two kinds of endmembers of diagnoses… the quick version that you usually need to get meds… and the long (expensive) version that schools generally need to grant educational accommodations. It seems like what you are looking for falls mostly into the first category, but either way, I’d start on campus because they are generally very knowledgeable in working with folks with learning differences and ADHD, and also some colleges and universities will provide testing in-house for free for enrolled students. I’d definitely look into their services before you graduate. I got diagnosed right after I graduated and missed out on a lot of help that is expensive once you’re no longer a student. If they don’t provide services through the school, the disabled students office will generally be connected with practitioners in the community who “get it”, who believe in ADHD, and who see a lot of high functioning versions of ADHD. You could get recommendations from them of folks in the community that they commonly refer students to and who students have had good experiences with. It really sounds like you’ve found someone who is not familiar with what ADHD looks like in women. It is fair for folks to be cautious about making sure someone isn’t faking (or misdiagnosed) because of the potential for stimulants to be abused or addictive, so that’s good… but you also need someone who will listen to you and work with you to figure out a plan to get you support. Anyone who says you are smart enough to come up with a lot of coping mechanisms so you must not have ADHD doesn’t get it. Also, they should try to figure out if your depression is comorbid with, or caused by untreated ADHD, if they know enough to work on helping you make that distinction, I’d be open-minded. The words depression/anxiety didn’t really seem the right words for the questions in that category of diagnosis when I got diagnosed… I ranked high there, and low overall because I score low on all the hyperactive questions, but the DSM definition seems to be kinda outdated for diagnosing women and inattentive presentations from what I’ve learned on this website… good luck!

    in reply to: What are meds supposed to feel like? Also, pms? #66756
    Ellings4
    Participant

    So the difference the meds make would probably take less than a week to notice?
    Thank you so much for your reply, Lys!!

    in reply to: Can't wake him up! #64339
    Ellings4
    Participant

    This happens to me (33) when I’m not strict about sleep. It doesn’t happen when I’m camping, so I figured it’s the light. Not looking at screens after sunset (or having Flux or some app that turns the screen red) helps, having it really dark when I go to sleep helps (I noticed that I can’t sleep when the moon is full – so I have to block it out), and having lots of natural light in the morning helps (although if it gets light but I go back to sleep, I’m even more of a morning zombie and part of the year getting up that early doesn’t make sense).

Viewing 9 posts - 1 through 9 (of 9 total)