My Forum Comments
June 10, 2019 at 7:22 pm in reply to: Seriously how do you meditate with a brain that never stops?! #119402
Practicing belly breathing before meditation can reduce anxiety, which I’ve found helpful. It turns out that when we breathe mostly from the upper chest, it amps up our fight or flight nervous system, which can create a self sustaining loop of anxiety.
The Breathe2relax app has good information and a simple exercise you can practice with.
Could you disclose the meds that help you with exhaustion?
I’m also very good at the things you mentioned, but at some point those things became like an addiction. It was at about your age or a few years younger, that I couldn’t get enough of the work I was doing. I did computer support work. Analysing and solving problems on a wide variety of computer makes and models, for a number of different companies. I was always outperforming my peers, partly due to ego. But I was constantly taking my work home in my mind. After work I was still solving problems in my head that were unresolved during that day, or any day for that matter. I loved the slightly insane pace that I could operate my mind, it was addicting. At the same time, I was also exercising excessively just to make it worse. At some point I was getting the signs of a nervous breakdown. Eyelid twitching, feeling exhausted but not able to shut it down. Then I had cycles of crashing, recovering, crashing. I don’t remember how many times that went on. There’s more but that was the beginning of some serious problems.
How is your breathing when you’re not exercising? Do you tend to hold your breath or take shallow breathes when under stress? Do you remember the last time your breath had a deep, relaxed and satisfying feeling to it?
October 29, 2018 at 5:36 pm in reply to: I’ve lost hope, will and desire to go on and keep trying #102672
Oscar, you said you had very successful hard working parents. Were they also very busy or very occupied with whatever they were doing at home?
Lowered sense of self esteem, or feeling unimportant kind of thing?
Fear of rejection, or being at odds with other people?
I think we have more emotional thoughts than event oriented ones. So it’s hard to remember a lot of details. I can’t remember much about interactions and situations with other people, but I can easily remember objects and some frequent locations. Old bikes, trikes, skateboards and scooters. Outdoor toys like the frisbee, hula hoop, slip n slide, and the deadly water wiggle. All the different plants and trees in the backyard. An old photograph will immediately bring back all that physical stuff, but memories of events seem to be very short lived and not that interesting.
- This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by MrNeutron.
Does anyone here know the average level of promiscuous thoughts and actions in women?
That’s the question you should be asking.
I’ve had the same experience as you for many years. I have this feeling that it might be caused by the ongoing suppression of our emotions over a period of time. The reason for suppressing our emotions, is due to the fact that our emotions tend to be much stronger and we’re afraid of being overwhelmed by them. So our emotions become trapped, unused and deadened because they don’t get released. That’s my theory anyway.
Are you feeling tired or exhausted underneath it all?
I think that ADHD kids have a great potential for comedy, and I know there are comedians out there who have ADHD.
Has anyone experimented with Mad Libs for their child?
Just one example:
Whatever you do to help yourself, do it now. Looking back into the past and getting stuck in it, will make things seem worse when they’re not. The mind is powerful and can create very believable stories, but they are just stories and not actually happening. When you’re feeling crappy, look to see if your mind is replaying those old stories over and over. It’s difficult to understand at first, but you actually have a choice in whether you want to keep those old movies rolling or not. It’s not that you feel bad, as much as it is the viewing of those not so good stories, which are making you feel bad. It’s like your watching some miserable TV program, but your too tired to get up find the remote and change the channel.
I was also that way and I’m in that state right now. Can you get her involved with yourself or others in some sort of endeavor? Take her out walking or drive somewhere that could provide stimulation? I get a feeling like there’s nothing going on here that is very important, maybe I’ll fall into a kind of malaise. It’s like going to sleep.
I just thought of something. Can you get her to help in making some type of food dish? Bake something, mix something together?
- This reply was modified 2 years, 5 months ago by MrNeutron.
Nessa, you are very much not alone in the comment you made about his father acting like a friend. For years we haven’t been producing fathers who are positive mature male role models, and who can also spend enough time with their children. This places a burden on mothers and society in general. Boys especially need a kind of discipline that’s done in a caring and positive way, and most people have never experienced a male figure that can deliver on those qualities.
I copied this from an article that has some suggestions.
Many of today’s fathers did not have positive role models to show them how to be a father, so they are not there to show their children what it means to be a father.
No matter how great a mother is, she cannot replace what a father provides to a child. Irrefutable research shows that mothers are typically nurturing, soft, gentle, comforting, protective and emotional. Fathers tend to encourage risk-taking and to be challenging, prodding, loud, playful and physical. Children need a balance of protection and reasonable risk-taking. If a positive male role model isn’t around, there is a void in this child’s life. Children without positive male role models are more likely to be involved in criminal activity, premarital sexual activity, do poorer in school and participate in unhealthy activities.
Studies have shown that involvement of a father or a positive male role model has profound effects on children. Father-child interaction promotes a child’s physical well-being, perceptual ability and competency for relating with others. Furthermore, these children demonstrate greater ability to take initiative and evidence self-control.
How can you make a positive difference for these children?
Encourage positive male role model involvement in your child’s life if you’re a mom.
If you’re a non-custodial dad, make the effort to visit with your children more often. You can also be very intentional about teaching them important life lessons.
If you are an educator, encourage fathers to be more active in the classroom.
You can influence the lives of children in your community be being a positive male role model.
Faith-based institutions and programs can bring fathers together with their children.
Additionally, they can encourage male role models to engage children in their sphere of influence.
Business leaders can encourage employee involvement in community efforts with children.
For example, you can promote mentoring with organizations like Boy Scouts, Girl Scouts, Big Brothers-Big Sisters, youth groups, Boys Club or Girls, Inc.