kim_D

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  • in reply to: No Passion No Energy No Care #69414
    kim_D
    Participant

    I just listened to the webinar with Adam Price Phd called “Your teen is not lazy! How to best motivate your teen with ADHD”. It was super helpful on this topic specifically and should be available on this site to stream. My husband and step-daughter both have ADHD and I don’t and there is a very steep learning curve to how the ADHD brain works. I don’t claim to understand but I try and when I forget I am always reminded that their brains don’t work the same way as mine does. I read a quote recently that was something like, “Parenting makes us become better people than we ever wanted to be” or something to that effect – and I can definitely relate to that, maybe you can, too!

    in reply to: Frustrating Mornings #48917
    kim_D
    Participant

    Hello! What your dealing with probably sounds familiar to everyone on this forum! We’ve tried lots of things with my 11yo step-daughter (of 9 years) and have found a routine that works for her. Luckily for us she loves school (for now), so actually waking up isn’t so bad however maybe it helps that she gets 15-20 min of screen time when she wakes up? It might sound crazy but she knows that she has that time upon waking so not only does it motivate her to get up, but it also gets her brain firing. We have tried using “free time” as an incentive to move quickly down the list of chores but this is one of the red flags that alerted us that something was different because she is obsessed with youtube but couldn’t seem to get things done and regularly did not get her free time. Also, like someone else mentioned – get them up a little earlier. My kid gets up an hour and a half before leaving for the bus. That way she has her built in “wake up” screen time, enough time to shower (she prefers to do it in the morning), have a nutritious breakfast, sometimes she has to make her lunch if she didn’t have time the night before and sometimes she even has an extra 10 min. The other thing we do is enlist TIMERS! They seriously work like magic for ADHD. It gives them something to focus on and strive to beat. I’ve never used the timer as a challenge, more so an anchor to what they are focused on at the moment. She was suspicious at first, but she realized herself that it was helping and she rarely protests when we enlist timers. Sometimes, I have her use them for her math homework so she doesn’t get as distracted. It becomes the difference between finishing a 3 page math assignment in 30 min vs 1hr30min. The timers aren’t about a race or punishment if they don’t beat it or anything. We try to set a fair and realistic time to accomplish a task and if she doesn’t make it then we add a couple more minutes. Like I said it’s just an anchor. I do not have ADHD, I’m not an expert, I have had to trial and error and figure this stuff out on my own and with the help of the internet! I feel your struggle and just wanted to share what works for us (most of the time). Hang in there!

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