My Forum Comments
I would start the cost reward system with all privileges in tact. And for your son, you may need to really try hard to find the smallest of the smallest positives and provide a ticket. Going this route will ensure behavior modification any day over negative consequences which just result in power struggles. Even if you say good morning and he isn’t rude. TICKET. Sometimes you have to start very basic.
Also keep in mind behavior therapy especially with children takes a very long time to change behaviors. 2 months is an extremely short amount of time to assess change. If you have concerns schedule a parent meeting with the therapist.
I have an adhd son in 3rd grade it can be hell sometimes. Keep fighting.
I like the positive spin on the impulsivity. I think children with adhd get way more negative messages at school than they do positive reinforcement. Sometimes we have to put ourselves in their shoes the best we can. Imagine living with a brain that makes peoppe constantly frustrated with you, sending you messages that the way you are and the way you do things is wrong all the time. Thats hard. I agree positive reinforcement as much as possible even for the smallest things works much more than punishment
My partner is 33 and just diagnosed last year with adhd and started Concerta. It does help but his impulsivity and poor executive functioning skills like organization and the ability to think back on previous experiences to make different choices moving forward has me in extreme frustration at times but at least now I know the reason. To be a partner if someone with adhd you need to learn the disorder inside and out and all that comes with it. Many people with adhd also have sensory processing issues and poor executive functioning skills. It is hard. My 8 year son also has adhd. And having 2 with adhd in the family is so hard. Luckily me and my youngest son do not have it although I have other mental illnesses so I get it to some extent. Lots of positive reinforcement whenever they are doing a behavior you want is critical. Dramatic praise lots of it. Positive reinforcement needs to be immediate and frequent. We are starting couples counseling as well. It’s not easy and I applaud all my adhd partners and non adhd partners that are trying to hold onto their relationship. You’re strong.
I so feel for you!! My son also has been slipping through the cracks at school he’s only in 3rd grade but has had a 504 plan since kindergarten and we have exhausted the accommodations available under the plan. He’s need further intervention but he’s smart and he’s been denied an iep previously. I have a new iep eval next month and I am not taking no for an answer. The school struggles are the worst they don’t get it either even though they work with many children who have adhd struggles. My son has a stealing issue too been banned from stores, stolen from family members leaving those relationships strained. Nobody understands and it can feel isolating l. Thank you for sharing
Family relationships are definitely strained for me because they are older, uninformed on adhd and know zero about it. Judge judge judge tell me what I should do and shouldn’t do suggest things like I haven’t already tried it. How about learn about my son’s struggles then let’s have s conversation. Frustrating to talk to people that don’t get it but think they are helping. Also I have an iep eval meeting at my son’s school he was denied 2 years ago and I’m thinking this time they might also be resistant. Any tips would be helpful