My Forum Comments
I struggle with similar problems. I find I spend more time preparing to do something than I do actually doing it, or the techniques I use with study are very inefficient.
I’ve been trying to find some helpful sources of advice recently, and came across this article. While this article might not be overly helpful with prioritising workload, the author might well be a very good source of information. I found the forgetting curve very helpful, which makes me think he has a lot more useful advice.
I looked into the author, Doug Puryear, who is a Psychiatrist who was diagnosed at 64. He talks a lot about his own difficulties with studying when he was going through med school. He has published a book with a section on studying. I have just ordered it via snail mail. Unfortunately the kindle version isn’t available for me in Australia.
Might be worth you having a look though, perhaps his study section though, perhaps it will help :).
That’s good, glad to hear that he has been more receptive! This is your journey and the number 1 priority is that you get the support and guidance in the areas that you need! Don’t be afraid to back up your own thoughts and instincts, as you are your own champion sometimes :). I hope that this is the beginning of a better, more productive relationship there!
I’m glad to hear that things have been better for you recently, and I’m glad to hear that the Adderall is helping! ADHD runs pretty strongly in families, as I’m sure you have read about!
It might be a good idea to look at finding a Psychologist who could help you a bit better considering your recent diagnoses? Finding the right person who has a solid understanding of the things you are trying to work through, and who you feel you have a connection with is so important. If that level of understanding isn’t there, it can be hard to make progress. It might be worth looking into at any rate 🙂
How do YOU feel about the diagnosis? You know yourself better than anyone, so I would trust in yourself and your feelings on the matter.
Many people go undiagnosed all their lives, and often misdiagnosed due to comorbid conditions. It is possible that you have ADHD, PTSD and depression. If the depression is what your PsyD has been purely focusing on then perhaps he is missing the big picture.
I’ve been on antidepressants for years, I’ve been on a combination of two, which is jokingly referred to by psychiatrists as ‘Californian rocket fuel’. My Psychiatrist that diagnosed me for ADHD was quite surprised at the dosage of one of them, as it was a very high dose. And for all of that, I was always feeling below average, just getting by. I was beginning to think that I was treatment resistant. Now I realise that it was untreated ADHD.
Do you mind me asking if you have been taking any medications for the last 8 years for depression? If so, how much do you feel it has helped? Also, regarding your PsyD, I understand therapy can often be incredibly beneficial as an ongoing, lifelong process. My most recent therapist was fantastic, and I probably should still be seeing her, as she taught me so many things about life that I somehow completely missed! Over eight years with him, how do you feel he has helped you? Do you feel like he has made great change over the period or is there something that you feel still just isn’t right. Something that just feels like it hasn’t been addressed? If that is the case, I would open your mind to other conditions which may be underlying ie the inpatient Psychiatrist may well be spot on. My massive doses of antidepressants and sporadic therapy over the years never fully worked as they were treating only half of the problem.
Also, how much experience does your PsyD have with ADHD? Mine, bless her, had a working knowledge, enough to agree with my diagnosis, but she ended up asking me a bunch of questions about the medication and condition – do I just take it when studying etc, what difference does it make, how long can I actually focus for without it etc. She is a clinical psychologist as well which is the equivalent to the PsyD. This told me although she knew the defining characteristic about it, she didn’t fully understand how the condition affects people on a day to day basis. All of the traits that are less talked about, or don’t fit neatly in the diagnostic criteria, she didn’t know so much about. But she wasn’t trained to do that, her role is much different than that of a Psychiatrist.A Psychiatrist has studied more extensively than a Psychologist and a Psychiatrist will understand the physiological causes and complexities of the condition much better. I don’t mean to undermine a Psychologists role by any means, they have an invaluable part to play in treatments for mental health where psychiatrists and medications can fall short, but I would be more inclined to trust the evaluation of a Psych on these grounds.
Have you started on ADHD meds? If so have you found them to be helpful? How do you feel when you read about ADHD in adults? Do you feel ‘that’s me!’ When you read about it? Also bear in mind that ADHD can manifest a bit differently depending on subtype etc. Myself, and some other adult members of my family have all been diagnosed fairly recently. It is interesting to note how different we are and the level to which it is noticeable. Undiagnosed ADHD can be very difficult to detect for an outsider if that person has learned how to mask their difficulties well. This certainly does not mean that this person is really functioning well internally.
I hope this helps!
Just noticed this post is a couple of months old, so hopefully you’ve been able to talk to a professional regarding diagnosis, if not, then hopefully this advice will help.
I can completely relate! Receiving a diagnosis for me was life changing in many ways. One big one was explaining why I have always been such a loose cannon and why I have always behaved and felt so differently. Why couldn’t I be ‘normal’!
My diagnosis was only recent and I was really afraid of talking to my doctor about it as I was certain I would be told I was being silly. Especially because all of my medical history is mental health related, I was certain he would think ‘oh here we go again 🙄’. I’m so glad I did though. I had to be referred to a psychiatrist to be treated, as GP docs here can’t diagnose and then prescribe stimulants in Australia. Can you get a referral via the public health system? It might take a long time but if you get diagnosed correctly it will be worth it. While you are on the wait list you could put a bit of money away each week and perhaps if you save enough you could get seen more quickly on the private system.
Write down everything you want to explain on a notepad and take it with you. I get nervous and forget all of the important things I want to talk about when I feel like I’m put on the spot. I had 3-4 pages of my ‘proof’; examples of behaviours and traits that are all associated with ADHD and also specific examples.
Do you have any of your school reports cards? My Psych requested to see mine, just to back up her diagnosis as the meds are controlled. I was nervous about this – feeling like a fraud if I couldn’t find any then worried that they wouldn’t have the information she wanted to see. I found one in the end, it was actually rather comical. All the things she was asking me about, the teachers were berating me for in my report! It had ADHD written all over it. If you can dig any up, it will give you some hard evidence to take along with you.
I’ve been honest with my GP and my psych about alcohol abuse, but I didn’t tell them about my drug history as I was worried about being judged and also worried about being denied treatment. I was very similar to you though. Tried most things and partied very hard but never formed an actual dependence on drugs, although in hindsight, it was very borderline.
I hope this helps. If you get knocked back on the public system, save up to see an ADHD specialist, or a Psych with an interest and experience with ADHD. If they have any experience with ADHD, they will recognise it in your history. It will change your life for the better, so go for it, and don’t give up until you find a doc that understands!
😄 very happy to hear, for both you and your daughter 😊
Haha! You need an app called Yummly in your life 😊. Once you choose a recipe you can add all of your ingredients to a shopping list. You then tick off each ingredient on your phone as you put it in the trolley 👍.
I don’t struggle as much following lists, but my mum (also diagnosed ADD) does! Guaranteed she will leave a few things off from a paper list, bless her!
I’m so sorry to hear about what happened with your brother in law.I can completely understand your hesitation.
I would find a Psychiatrist that specialises in ADD to talk to first. Hopefully they can explain how the medication works to put your mind at rest. Antidepressants are much scarier with their side effects than ADD meds. I’ve had depression and anxiety since early teens, and it was an unpleasant experience finding out which antidepressant medications didn’t worsen my symptoms. I was also misdiagnosed with bipolar in my mid twenties, and the meds I tried to tried for that were also absolutely awful and crippling for my mental health.
It’s only been quite recent that I have been diagnosed with ADHD, and the change for me since being on ADHD has been only positive. The doctors will start her on a very low dose and will make sure she doesn’t experience any negative side effects before increasing it. She can also start on a short acting formulation that will only work for four hours, so if she does experience any side effects, it won’t take long to wear off.
I can understand it must feel terrifying starting her on a medication given your previous experience with your brother in law. I believe that the ADHD meds have been very well researched over the last 30 years, and the drugs that are on the market are mostly variations of the same two molecules.
I hope this helps. It might also be helpful to hear in mind that many studies have proven that people with ADD/ADHD who are treating it do much better in life than people with ADD/ADHD who are not treating it. As a person who was diagnosed later in life, this is something I relate to very well 🙂.
I really feel for your situation, it is a tough one! I’ll try not to repeat too much that others have already advised – all of the advice posted in this thread is spot on!
Your parents view point is coming from a place of worry, so maybe you could find a psychiatrist that specialises in ADHD, and once you have built a rapport with this psych, you could bring your parents along to a session.
I’ve only been diagnosed with ADHD recently, at 34 years old. For most of my twenties, I flirted very heavily with substance and alcohol abuse. I was highly impulsive, did a lot of things I regret and largely wasted many years. I also struggled with depression and anxiety, even during periods where I would get my act together, exercise and avoid alcohol and drugs. I was honest about alcohol dependency during my diagnosis but I wasn’t very forthcoming about my history using drugs.
I’ve found my ADHD meds to be immensely helpful with my day to day functioning, mental health, anxiety and clarity. I’ve tried both short acting and long acting with no desire to abuse my medication in anyway. My preference is even for the extended release formulation.
Given the above and everyone else’s great advice, I would find a psych with a better understanding of ADHD, and I would try to get them to help your parents understand better.
All the best, I hope you work something out!
Thank you. That article was also very helpful :).
So sorry to read about what you are going through. But ask yourself, if you do everything they want you to do you think that will make them happy? I get the feeling that nothing you can do will ever make them truly happy, so why not start living life for yourself?
Maybe write them a letter, explain how they make you feel, and ask them to give their support to you to pursue your own goals. No wonder you don’t feel any ambition; because you are being pushed down a road you don’t want to live on. Neither your parents or yourself are happy with how things are currently standing anyway, so why don’t you at least allow yourself some happiness?
All the best, I hope things work out and they start giving you the support you deserve as their son. Xx
I was diagnosed with pmdd a few years ago and only recently with adhd. I’m still waiting to start adhd meds but I have been using Zoely (nomegestrol/estradiol) for pmdd, which has been life changing. My pmdd would last two weeks every month and was sheer hell. I had bad experiences with any hormonal meds in the past prior to pmdd diagnosis and was reluctant to use it as a treatment. My doc explained what caused the symptoms (rising levels of progesterone) and put me on zoely as this is one of the newer pills which mimics natural oestrogen better. Maybe talk to your doc about treating the pmdd with something similar?