My Forum Comments
January 8, 2018 at 7:32 pm in reply to: Placement for young adult who failed Freshman year college #72720
Thank you so much Penny! These articles help a lot. I spoke with the admissions director at SOAR; their program is promising. Because it’s a big investment, I am trying to make sure to research all the options. If you think of any others, would you mind posting them? The second article you attached gives names of people who run general gap programs (though not programs specifically for ADHD young adults); I will reach out to them.
If you run across the names of any consultants who specialize in placing ADHD young adults who need alternatives to college, would you mind passing that along too?
Your advice matches what other professionals are telling me, Penny.
At this point the best strategy appears to be maintaining communication and trust while allowing her to separate. When she is ready to accept help at least she’ll feel free to turn to us. Setting limits she cannot meet will likely backfire. For me, not nagging or setting limits is difficult; I feel such loss of control and fear. But it helps that she’s talking to me.
Your son is lucky to have you. It sounds like you are giving him exactly what he needs to succeed – even though it takes a lot of effort on your part.
Your response helps. Thank you for taking the time to share your experience with me.
I think you hit the nail on the head when you wrote, “If it’s denial, and not wanting to be different, and not wanting to need extra help, then that’s a whole different ballgame to engage in. And much more difficult to overcome.”
Thanks to your post (and the articles you cited) I have been reading up on avoidance. Do you have any suggestions on how to tackle this obstacle?