imok

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  • in reply to: How can I remember useful things I read in books? #101503
    imok
    Participant

    I to have the books, and what feels like hundreds of good idea quotes. And unless they are in my face, I don’t remember them. I remember the ones I’ve practiced more, but even those I don’t remember all the time. Like “Handle it once”. I have a tendency to put something at the top of the stairs with the intent to bring it down stairs later. Later can become days. If I can remind myself of the phrase “handle it once” at the time, I will bring the item downstairs and not have to think about it again. I’m so proud of myself when I can do that. Oh and yes I do put notes up. I seem to be good at bypassing those too. I think it was on here somewhere that suggested making the notes very large, and put in places that I can’t miss seeing them. This works only if I remember to do it. 😂 Consistently inconsistent! It drives me nuts! 😜

    in reply to: Think Before You Act? Easier Said Than Done (new user) #90550
    imok
    Participant

    Thank you Suzannem, Like I said I was doing the kinda skim not skim thing. I can see how you would want to clarify that your point. I went back and really read it. I think seeing all the letters and gadget words, just made my mind glaze over it. 😅. I do believe you are correct, that spouses should not assemble projects together. Also I found that I have to make sure I’m in the right mindset for the project. New concept I’m learning and working on. I seem to hit overload at the drop of a hat. So my therapist is asking that before I start something, ask myself if I’m mentally ready for it. I may have to settle myself first. I loved last weeks Defcon 1 article! 😂😂.

    imok
    Participant

    Paul, I truly hope your doing better. I too stumbled across your post in hopes of finding.. just what you wrote! Like what purplepoppie said. Describes me to a T.
    And you definitely have the talent to be able to write it out like that. I have to keep your post so I can refer to it when I need help explaining to others what I mean.
    Aur462, you also described my spousal relationship, pretty well. My husband isn’t a big sharer of feelings, but I can see how he may see me like you see your wife. I plan on sharing this with him.
    Purplepoppie, I’m so glad you posted here as well. 2 years ago I found a good cognitive therapist. (And to credit Aur462, slight autism spectrum was brought up) I learned I have PTSD, that contributed to social behavior disabilities growing up as a child.
    Purple, you also described me, as where I am now, and what I’m working on. Some bridges I’ve burned may never be repaired but I’m learning to accept that and move on for myself. This time of Changing and learning how to be a better “me” has been the worst and best.
    I still struggle sometimes with the … how to ask someone a question in a way that I will get the answer I want. Or vise versa.

    Thank all three of you, for letting me know I’m not totally alone on this point

    in reply to: Think Before You Act? Easier Said Than Done (new user) #90541
    imok
    Participant

    A, I jumped on here real quick yesterday on an impulse to reply to your post. I was diagnosed with ADD/bipolar NOS, at 40. Was given meds and dr hallowell’s book to READ! Of course I did what every normal ADHD person would do…open it with intrigue, looking for the stuff that pertains to me,hoping to find all the answers to help me better understand myself and the guide lines to a better life. 1min later I’m just flipping through the pages looking for points of interest. Looking for the stuff that says “here is what you have to do”. Not “here’s ideas of what might work best for you”. Did my best to get through what I thought I needed out if it, it’s been on the book on shelf ever since. I have always struggled with reading. Reading in general is never smooth sailing. I have a tendency to tell people, I’m the slowest reader on the planet. Book reports in school were especially challenging, took me the allotted time just to read the book never mind write a report on it. Manuals, instructions and menus, are almost like a foreign language. I know the words, they’re just not put in the right order for me to understand them, correctly. Hence the “I don’t speak “manual” comment. In my 55 years of life, I have never known anyone that could understand how hard this reading of things is for me. And here you are, putting it all down, in better words than could have done. Thank you.
    In my last response, I was “rushed”. I had a doc appt I needed to go to. But I really wanted to respond to your post. I figured I had enough time to do that, before I left. Like others here, Time is a relative term. What I thought took about 5mins turned out to be more like 15mins. Crap, now I think I’m going to be late cuz I spent to much time online, I still had a couple things to do, I get that whirlwind kinda (painful)rush feeling that time is my enemy, careless mistakes made, like getting into the car and realizing that I took everything out with me but the car keys. Now I have to use the hide key to get back into the house, get my keys, put key back and then head out. During all this I felt like I wasted so much time, and now I’m going to be late. Long story short, I got to my appt 2mins early.
    Buddy system with spouse, dead on.
    I finally got a therapist 2 years ago that has been able to help me understand and work through all my “different channels” I’m a perfectly, wonderfully operating AM radio that keeps getting FM signals. Once I find the right “converter” I need to understand the FM signal, I’m good to go. Getting others to know you need one is another thing all it’s own. The other thing I’m finding is that the more I learn and know about what ADHD and how it relates to me, the better I can find what works for me. Trial and error is such a drag. The ADDitude magazine has been a great help. And I even read the whole Dr Hallowell book last year. -knowledge is power.
    I enjoyed, skimmed and got a bit overwhelmed with reading all the replies to your post. I love what Julia wrote. All good things to know and grow with. We’re all a work in progress.
    And it’s nice to see so many AM radios out there. 😊

    Oh, omega3 pills helped me, along with a calcium/mag/vitamin D tablet. (calcium helps calm the nerves). And unfortunately yes, killing off the sugars and junk food helps. Though I haven’t made that one a true habit yet. Practice, practice, practice, patience, patience, self patience.

    in reply to: Think Before You Act? Easier Said Than Done (new user) #90405
    imok
    Participant

    Hi,newbie here also. I’m going to say your comment about reading instructions, menus and what not just pulled me in. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve told people, I don’t speak “manual”. Your descriptions were perfect. I’m short on time but if I don’t say something now I’ll forget. I’ve been accepting the manual language barrier and if I don’t feel the project it’s going well, I just stop and tell myself tomorrow. Or come back later. Take it on in pieces. And of course HELP. I had to give up on my not asking for help. Embrace the chaos that is me. Knowledge is power. There time, see, thought I’d have time for my full response. 😂😂😂. More later

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