i_spell

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  • in reply to: Behaviour #98871
    i_spell
    Participant

    Sometimes children with anxiety can also hold it together until they get home and then they melt. One great idea is creating a structured downtime as soon as he is home with some alone activities that help with regulation: snack, room with door closed and colouring, lego, stuffies, etc. After some alone time, then exercise to regulate energy again. If you make it something everyone has to do, then it’s more about self-care. If it’s truly ADHD it will start to affect academics once they become more challenging. Teaching him self-regulation now could go a long way to helping him help himself and not take it out on you. Hope that is helpful…

    in reply to: Trying to do self care with an ADHD spouse feels impossible #98870
    i_spell
    Participant

    My husband is the same. I have a few suggestions. I started using sleeping pills for short term crises needs. 3-4 mights in a row where I fall asleep and stay asleep can be very calming. I also use white noise (usually waves crashing) and a sleep mask so that I don’t hear or see anything else. Though is can be a bit uncomfortable, the idea things are ear plugs or headphones (JBL makes cordless ones that are noise cancelling too). There are times when I am just so tired I need to know he won’t come into the room after I fall asleep, so he will sleep in the basement or in the couch. These are all pretty practical tips and sleep is super important if you want to engage in self-care. It’s the priority really. Hope that helps. I actually think it would be amazing if we had our own rooms and just had date nights from time to time…we graduated to a king size bed with an expensive mattress and I hardly notice him in it sometimes…and he kicks his legs and flaps his arms at night, especially if he’s stressed or overtired.

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