My Forum Comments
Good for you for seeking help. I have three kiddos with ADHD, so I understand the dilemma. I’d start by having your parents join you in a session with your therapist and have him/her explain his reasoning for putting you on a stimulant. I’d also check with the psychiatrist to determine whether he suspects a comorbid diagnosis. For example, people with bipolar need to be very careful with stimulants as they trigger mania. Also, stimulants trigger anxiety in people who have anxiety. There are work arounds to both, but you need a psychiatrist who’s familiar with both conditions. I’d talk to your therapist about being completely transparent with your parents. As a mom, I get worrying about substance abuse. That’s probably more frightening to them than you dealing with ADHD. They probably need more information about how debilitating ADHD can be. It sounds like they may be more willing to hear this from a specialist. By being transparent, you’ll (hopefully) open the door of communication. Also, you could approach them by bargaining (be sure to involve your therapist in this). Tell them you’ll submit to regular drug tests (assuming your willing to give up pot) and/or offer to have them hold and distribute your stimulant meds (they could keep it in a lock box). Also, the drug Concerta (methylphenidate) can be obtained in patch form (Daytrana) and eliminates the rebound effect. It also has the benefit that you can apply it later in the day and removed 3 hours before bed. With the therapist, you can let them know that your goal is to eventually move out and live on your own. You’d like to work toward finding effective treatment for your ADHD and would rather do that while your home and have their support.
Hope that helps. Don’t give up! In the meantime, you could look into supplements (fish oil, etc.) and exercise, as both should help. This website has info on supplements. God bless!
This is so helpful to hear. My oldest (ADD) son HATES talking on the phone. He’s ok with family/friends, but has anxiety attacks and gets really angry if he has to call someone other than a friend. He’s told me his mind goes blank and he panics. He sometimes has the same problem in face-to-face conversations with customers at work.
When I was a teen/young adult I also would get really nervous making phone calls. My mom always made me make my own calls, which was super hard. But, through this I learned some tricks.
1. I wrote down what I had to say or ask. That way, if I forgot, I could just read it.
2. I’d write out answers to questions the other person might ask, so I felt prepared.
3. I practiced saying ‘i don’t know, I’ll have to call you back’ or ‘excuse me, but I need to call you back.’ That way, if I was completely stuck, I had an out. They didn’t need to know why I was getting off the phone.
4. If i spaced out, i’d say “I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”
5. I remind myself that most people are fairly nice and want to help. By visualizing the other person as friendly or caring, it reduces my anxiety.
Hope that helps! While I still don’t like making calls, with a lot of practice, I’m much more comfortable doing it.
I would not mention your add. It’s a medical issue and not something that needs to be shared. If you are qualified to do the job, and capable of handling the companies expectations, then you don’t need to disclose your disability. It sounds like you have developed strategies for handling the struggles that add causes and that’s a strength!
We also have ADHD kids who struggle in school. It’s hard for kids to be motivated when they’re overwhelmed. I recommend checking his med level. He may need a bump up if he’s had a recent growth spurt. What also helps is positive reinforcement. My son earns his media time (max 1/2 hour on school days). He gets checks worth 5 minutes for following instructions (putting away lunch bag, doing chores, homework, etc) you could do something similar for school. Kids with ADHD seem to need more of the ‘external’ motivation. Also, you might check with an occupational therapist to see if your child has any sensory processing problems. Be sure to find someone who specializes in that area. Untreated sensory problems will contribute to ODD and ADD symptoms. Hang in there. It gets better!! God bless.
I have 3 kids with ADHD and sensory processing disorder. We also struggle with the med rebound and morning craziness. One med that really helped was Daytrana. It’s a version of concerta administered by patch. The best part is you can apply it 1/2 hour before your child wakes up so the med is working before their feet hit the floor. It also works great if they sleep in on the weekend, because you can apply it any time. Just remove the patch 3 hours before bedtime. We found that the rebound effect was much less with the patch.
For the ODD/backtalk, I highly recommend the website http://www.empoweringparents.com. they have real, usable, practical advice for handling difficult kids (I’ve got one). The most important thing I’ve learned about my ODD daughter is to walk away. ODD kids LOVE to argue. They don’t care if they win or lose, they just like the power struggle. So, the best thing to do is disengage and come back when she’s calmed down and ready to listen.