genedoug

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  • in reply to: Too late for accommodations? #106347

    genedoug
    Participant

    I’m a therapist with ADHD inattentive type. Most colleges have a handicapped department that can help with accommodations that have been described above.
    In my own case, before I was ever diagnosed, I found that sitting on the front row and asking questions helped in maintaining my attention.
    I once had a wristwatch with lots of buttons on it, and using that I discovered that at exactly 4 minutes my eyes would be going over lines in a book, while I was thinking of something else. The watch would beep and I would return to my reading. You might be able to find one at radio shack.
    If you are hyperactive, it might help to take a soft rubber ball to class and squeeze on it at the same time you are writing. That might dissipate some of the energy and help you to concentrate.
    E. E. Douglas, M.Ed. LPC LMFT

    P.S. In college you do most of your work out of class. Nobody pesters you to do better, and whatever grade you make is not something the prof. worries about. You attend class 3 days a week (usually) and it looks like you have lots of free time (Not.) Everything is a distraction. Your friends want to go somewhere, somebody is playing cards, somebody wants to come in and shoot the breeze, there’s something on TV, etc. There is noise in the hallway, you want to go out with your girl, and so on. Watch out for the distractions. They’ll affect you more than the average guy. Watch out for procrastination. It’s seductive, and you’ll seem to have plenty of time, until you don’t.
    Notice that a lot of your friends who seem to have lots of time first semester aren’t there second semester. Notice that if you’ve studied well for a test and ace it, if the prof puts a distribution of grades on the board, there are lots of C’s and some D’s and F’s. Those are the ones who seemed to have a lot of free time to fool around.

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by  genedoug. Reason: added signature
    • This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by  genedoug. Reason: Had some additional thoughts
  • in reply to: Inattentive ADHD – meds or no meds? #106345

    genedoug
    Participant

    I’m a therapist with ADHD-inattentive type (ADD.) If you fear medication for some reason, see what coffee does for him. If you add cream and sugar, he’ll like it. Otherwise, tea or Mountain Dew soda pop also contain caffeine. One mother recently told me she even uses coffee to get him to go to bed.
    Most ADHD medications are amphetamines, in a small dose. Some are time-release. Because nearly all have been around forever, they are not patented and are usually cheap, other than a brand name, which also has a generic like it.

    If for some reason you avoid amphetamines, there is a brand called Strattera. It is not an abusable drug, meaning one can’t get “high” by taking an overdose. It is also expensive, because though it recently became out of patent, and there should be a generic (atomoxetine) the insurance companies persuaded Medicaid and Medicare to put it on tier 4 (meaning you don’t need it and there’s something cheaper.) I do need it, because amphetamines increase my blood pressure.
    Hope this helps.
    E. E. Douglas, M.Ed. LPC LMFT

  • in reply to: I really don't know what to do #106341

    genedoug
    Participant

    If she can turn it on and off depending on circumstances, it isn’t just the ADHD doing it. Her reason has more control of her behavior than she might like you to think.
    The consequence you provided is the best response, and the trick is to be consistent, so she can expect that is what will happen if she misbehaves. If it is rare, then she can gamble that you will do nothing, or just as bad, blow up at her. (Negative attention is still attention, and may actually increase the behavior.)

    At any rate, if you would overpower her with your strength, size and anger, she will be 15 and 16 soon, and would you want to use that method on a child who is your size?
    E. E. Douglas, M.Ed. LPC MFT

    • This reply was modified 1 year, 4 months ago by  genedoug. Reason: Left out signature. Softened Do to Would
  • in reply to: Just started 9 yo son on meds #51313

    genedoug
    Participant

    Not all ADHD medication is a stimulant. One exception is Strattera. Not only does it not keep one awake at night and not suppress the appetite, but it also does not cause blood pressure to rise. (I am 75 years old and have a problem with hypertension, so Stattera, though expensive, addresses that problem.) There is another brand that is approved for children only, also expensive, and there is a new one mentioned in this publication, that may be available in a couple of years.

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by  genedoug.
  • in reply to: Just started 9 yo son on meds #51260

    genedoug
    Participant

    A long argument suggests you are arguing, in the illusion that if you give him the proper information, he will understand, and will then cooperate. Not likely. If he agrees with you, which he won’t, then he doesn’t get what he wants. When you argue, you are making him judge and jury, and he will never rule in your favor.
    Think of an argument as like a tennis game. It can’t happen unless you bat the ball back. You are not obligated to produce the better argument, and he won’t agree even if you do. You are not obligated to produce one more answer than he does. The fact that you are the parent means your will wins, period.
    You should allow him one “how come,” and one “yes but.” More than one is misbehavior, and that misbehavior should have an understood consequence.
    Also when extinguishing a behavior, it always gets worse before it gets better. If you put a quarter into a Coke machine and it doesn’t deliver, you don’t just go away and never return. You shake the handle, maybe shake the machine, maybe insert another quarter and try again, and maybe look for the manager to see what he can do.
    Likewise, if you cut off a kid’s access to a misbehavior, he doesn’t just say “Oh, well,” and never do it again. He will increase his efforts to get around your new method and make you do as you did in the past, which had worked for him at the time.

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by  genedoug.
    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by  genedoug.
    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by  Penny Williams.
  • in reply to: ADHD + Masking Anxiety #51247

    genedoug
    Participant

    I’m a counselor who has ADHD, inattentive type. I am not hyperactive, other than I sometimes fidget, and am bored easily.
    When I was growing up, neither my parents nor my teachers had heard of ADHD or ADD (the older name.) It was called laziness, irresponsibility, not trying and not caring. I bought the story, and always tried not to be those things, and nearly always failed. The treatment for this was yelling, berating and threatening.
    Even after I got my master’s degree, I didn’t recognize my own diagnosis, and simply attempted to conceal my condition, as always before. I had strategies for compensating, such as sitting on a front row, asking questions, and taking notes.
    In one case, I had to read an extremely boring book, and my son had given me a watch with a stopwatch function. I didn’t know how I would get through it, but I set the stopwatch again and again, and discovered that at exactly 4 minutes, my eyes would be going over the words, but I would be thinking about something else. The alarm would ring, and I would resume reading until it rang again. I got through the whole book in that way.
    I had been counseling for several years, and had diagnosed a lot of people with ADHD, when one day I said, “I do that, too.” And then I started noticing that I did most of the things on the list.
    I went to a doc and got a prescription for Stattera, but after four months I discontinued, because it was expensive and I couldn’t see that it was doing anything for me.
    Later I attended a seminar in which it was stated that the stuff doesn’t start working until about four months had passed. I then got another prescription, and noticed that it was hard to tell if it was working, because I didn’t feel anything, and just felt “normal.” However, when I would get off of it I would notice the symptoms again.
    So now I just trust that, when I don’t notice anything, that means it’s working.

    • This reply was modified 2 years, 11 months ago by  genedoug.
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