foncused

My Forum Comments

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  • in reply to: I feel like I’m just awful at my job #116154
    foncused
    Participant

    You’re doing better than I did. I didn’t work much, although I have a college education. The few jobs I had, including volunteer jobs, I quit in either frustration at not being able to do it well, or boredom when it was simple enough that I could. (Past tense because I’m 64 now and no more jobs.)

    in reply to: ADD-like problems but maybe undiagnosable #116153
    foncused
    Participant

    Hey, thanks for the reply. I already do most of them–I’ve been working at being me for 64 years–they say that people with ADD can compensate over time.

    As for sorting out all the things there are to do… just two days ago I was looking around and saw something that suggested writing down EVERYTHING and prioritizing. I started doing that and it was a confusing mess. But finally it’s done, and it seems to be helping. I’m not constantly running from one activity to another that I just though of that seems more important–I bet you know how that goes. THen you come back to the first one and find you can’t re-find the things you need to finish it. So far, not happening now.

    Maybe I can avoid the crashing boredom that usually comes a few days into any project. I think you know that boredom. It seems as though you can’t stand to do whatever-it-is any more, that your life is going by while you’re stuck here in a sort of trap or cage.

    Do you think I should post much on here? Being not diagnosed–and some other people are going through so much while I’m doing okay as long as I don’t break my rules. I can live without the earrings. Reading the forum is good, and maybe I can spot people in my position and just reply to them, since I can’t have much advice for most of those on here and may just annoy them and bump their threads off the front page.

    in reply to: Funny Stories About ADHD Symptoms #116152
    foncused
    Participant

    Thanks for the story. I have a strict rule for myself about not leaving the kitchen when something’s cooking on the stove. I’ve lost too many pots that way.

    I’m not diagnosed with ADD, although counselors have suggested it. The main reason not is that I did well in school, and can’t remember much about those years. On current behavior, I hit almost every point, and have for decades.

    in reply to: ADD-like problems but maybe undiagnosable #115945
    foncused
    Participant

    KitanasFan,

    Thanks for the reply. We have a lot in common. I copied a few things:

    I was polite and stayed in my seat.

    I don’t remember a great deal from childhood either, but I remember that I was never really happy.

    I get bored incredibly easily with mundane tasks, I talk to myself, my brain is never quiet, it’s always thinking, remembering stuff I don’t want to think about and I hate spending long periods of time without mental stimulation.

    I have never pushed myself to achieve as I was always scared of failure.

    Maybe what you said about always knowing your brain wasn’t the same as everyone else’s is the same as my always being bewildered about what other people were even about, why they did the things they did, what they wanted from me, etc. That was worse in childhood so if that’s a symptom of ADD….

    Being only recently diagnosed, maybe you understand the craving to be diagnosed. It’s both about wanting to be part of a group, and wanting there to be a reason besides that you’re stupid and lazy–there was a book with that in the title, as I recall. There’s also wanting to get some tips on dealing with it, but I can read those here without the bloomin’ diagnosis.

    Do you have a favorite tip or two? A method for sorting out all the stuff there is to do that seems like too much to cram into one day? Or have you figured out how to not let it bother you?

    in reply to: ADHD and loneliness #115924
    foncused
    Participant

    I’m going to go back and read all the replies but I want to say that here’s another person with lifelong friend problems. I don’t know why but by now, I’ve pretty much accepted that people aren’t going to be a big part of my life, and I find other satisfactions. I have my house and my garden and my books, things like that, and if I keep busy I interact with the world and it responds to me–often better than people have done.

    foncused
    Participant

    I have a lot of experience with anxiety; it runs in my family.

    You may or may not be healthy enough for it, but the one thing that’s helped me the most is vigorous exercise. 10 minutes on an elliptical machine, or 20 minutes of really fast walking, cuts it down about 75%. This is not for people with heart problems, temperature regulation problems, etc.

    in reply to: My Psychiatrist Refuses To Help Me #115922
    foncused
    Participant

    I don’t know of a way to help except to say that I’m sorry. I am.

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