Waiting for medication for my partner, need help

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    • #122528


      My partner has ADD and he is on the waiting list for drugs but I am really struggling to cope with his sudden outbursts. It feels like nothing I do is good enough and I just don’t know what to do. I have tried waiting until he has calmed down to discuss it but we never seem to make any progress. He’s never really sorry for the things he does and the things he says when he’s worked up. Lots of things get broken. We have a child together and it breaks my heart to see her upset if she sees her daddy losing his temper. I really don’t know what to do. The majority of the time things are fine – he works hard to provide for us. I also work and we have a lovely home together and do lots of things together as a family. But every time he loses his temper it has a huge impact on me. It’s lead me to feel extremely anxious and I am constantly worrying about what might go wrong next.

      However, I don’t want to take any drastic action before he is given any drugs. I appreciate that the drugs won’t stop the outbursts necessarily but will enable him to control his thoughts and be more focused, as often these incidents happen when he is stressed at work. I don’t want to leave at all but I can’t go on like this.

      I really would appreciate any advice. Do you think things will improve when he eventually does get prescribed drugs?

      • This topic was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by marie123.
      • This topic was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by Penny Williams.
    • #122545

      Keep notice if his symptoms worsen. Not everyone is helped by stimulants that have ADD. There are non-stimulants & some people REALLY need a combo therapy like Wellbutrin or Gaba to balance out their chemicals before adding or trying a stimulant. I personally have a temper & have to work on it, I try to self regulate & immediately apologize bc I know it’s not ok. I try not to make it a habit, I just really suck at handling stress & have to watch myself from directing it at my partner. Usually I am subdued when my partner says he understands and expresses that he sees I’m having a difficult time of something.
      Sometimes I think we get into bad habits as a couple & we have to be careful how we talk to each other, through stress etc. Having a kid adds alot of stress. Not apologizing, though, is not ok & making a habit of it is not ok. You’re either a partnership that occasionally and healthily argues or it’s a warzone & you’re fighting against each other.

      I wish you the best and hope that his angry outburst are just a way of his brain stimulated itself, some people fight alot & don’t realize they’re doing it for those reasons.

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