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    • #168075
      Yarlan Zey

      Okay, here goes. I’m not diagnosed with ADHD but I don’t really trust psychologists etc. as a general rule, plus I don’t have much money to spend on talking to them. I was once diagnosed with “dyspraxia” (of the fine motor sort, as opposed to gross motor, if I remember the terms correctly) but I don’t think that’s a good fit.

      Maybe sometimes I appear dyspraxic, but other times I have above-average physical ability. I get anxious about exams, which affects my performance (please don’t give me unsolicited advice about exam anxiety by the way).

      I believe that a lot of the negative symptoms of ADHD basically come from trauma. It doesn’t have to be “extreme” trauma, it could be a pattern of micro-traumas, if you like. Maybe some people are born with a personality which doesn’t fit well with what society expects or values. Or maybe they’re just wired a little differently. But either way they’re more prone to traumas as a result.

      Another reason why I don’t want to talk to psychologists/psychiatrists etc. right now is that I know talking about my problems has done me harm in the past. That might sound controversial, but it’s true. Talking may help if you talk to the right people, but finding the right people is difficult, and you may harm yourself along the way.

      Anyway, my aim is to do some writing here which will hopefully help me and maybe even others. That might sound strange after the other stuff I’ve said, I don’t know. Right now I’m in the middle of something, so until next time.

    • #168287
      Penny Williams

      You might look into EMDR therapy. It is specifically designed to work through trauma, both big and small.

      ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Coach & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

      • #168695
        Yarlan Zey

        Thanks, I’ve heard that EMDR therapy can be good all right.

        Recently if I get a traumatic memory (often a micro-trauma), I try and see the memory from a bystander’s point of view, instead of re-living the memory in a first-person perspective. I imagine a friendly person beside me as we watch and comment on the memory. That might sound mad, but whatever.

        Some say people with ADHD are interest-based, rather than importance-based. This means that you should focus on how to make things more interesting for you, rather than focusing on how important those things are.

        I’ve learned a lot of things in the following way. First perhaps I’ll get hold of a book about a subject. I’ll start reading it. Soon enough I’ll probably get bored. Then maybe I’ll download a few podcasts of people talking about the subject. Then that gets boring. Perhaps I’ll find another book. Then that gets boring, or even annoying lol. Maybe I can find a documentary about the subject. After that, the first book I got hold of has become interesting to me again, and so on.

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