Talking

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This topic contains 10 replies, has 9 voices, and was last updated by  JBoom 3 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #87029

    Jolly
    Participant

    Im hyperactive and I talk really fast when i talk to people and I always want to explain a story to someone but my thoughts and my brain trying to put the words together get mixed up. I have a hard time trying to explain things and story’s to people and I also have very bad reading comprehension. Does that come with ADHD or is it just that my brain is overwhelmed? Does this happen to any of you?

  • #87122

    whisperingwings
    Participant

    Hi Jolly, I have ADHD (with hyperactivity and inattention) and it happens to me all the times. I also have dyslexia. I see (pictures, scenarios) what I want to say in my mind, or I have the answer but it doesn’t come out in the correct order, with the right pronunciation. It sounds jumble up, a run on sentence with horrible grammar that doesn’t make sense.

    If I can, I try to show people instead of explaining to them with speech. Or writing can help because I don’t feel pressure with the person in front of me waiting. For me, it’s better to work on a paragraph for more than 10 minutes, correcting it multiple times on the computer instead of being humiliated.

    Many people think I’m stupid, laugh at me or they think I’m suffering from anxiety. The anxiety does come but it’s secondary. It’s cause by being embarrassed from the symptoms. I don’t have any friends. The only people I get along with are ADHD or Dyslexics. Other people rush and judge me in a very negative way without trying or wanting to understand.

  • #87153

    Jolly
    Participant

    How old are you? I’m 15. I also see pictures in my brain, but that only happens when I’m reading, also from first to fifth grade I had to work on speech. I still sometimes have grammar issues while I’m speaking. It’s just so annoying. Also maybe what’s causing me not to be able to explain things is my impulsivness and excitement that’s getting in the way. I am going to go to the doctor in a week to get checked out for ADHD. I’m pretty darn sure I have the combined type. Is it possible that you can have mainly hyperactive but with a few inattentive symptoms? Cause that’s what I’m experiencing. sheesh, I just went on a rant.

  • #87183

    ADHDmomma
    Keymaster

    I think this is part of the executive functioning deficits common with ADHD. If you’re brain isn’t good at sequencing and organizing and working memory, then conversations and comprehension are difficult.

    What Does Executive Function Disorder Look Like in Adults?

    The Adult ADHD Mind: Executive Function Connections

    Penny
    ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

  • #87190

    whisperingwings
    Participant

    I’m old, I’m 33. I don’t know about having mainly hyperactive and few inattentive symptoms. I feel as if I have them both at the same time…if that is even possible. I think you are very bored with your surroundings. Are you getting help with speech?

    Sometimes I feel overexcited and happy about things that most people will not see as funny or amusing but maybe that’s because we can see and feel things they cannot catch? I still have trouble sitting still, waiting my turn, or even waiting at all. I see people my age and I cannot help but wonder “how do you do that?” This week, I made a lot of embarrassing mistakes with words. I misread “Brian King” and wrote “Burger King” in an email at work. Call someone “Kill” instead of “Kim.” I try to laugh at myself.

  • #87289

    strwbry
    Participant

    That Burger King thing is amazing. <3 I usually call my husband the dog’s name, and vice versa. People at work are usually sweetie or hun (I live in the south, so this is all acceptable). I know their names, but struggle to get the right one at the right time. 😛 We all make mistakes, I feel like they’re nature’s way of reminding us not to take life too seriously. 🙂

    I’m combined type inattentive and hyperactive, which means I struggle with listening to other people’s stories and take 10 years to tell my own. 😀

    I often get mixed up in conversations, too! I find that some people like my enthusiasm, but it can be draining in large doses. I just get so much more excited than other people! If they start to look away or fidget, they’re uncomfortable. I try to end the story quickly and keep my mouth shut for a few minutes, or ask them a question. Give them a chance to talk and try to listen, or at least pretend to listen and pick up the main points. Giving others a turn to talk seems to help them be more patient when I do get stuck on a tangent. I promise I don’t mean to hijack the conversation. I try to give them the reigns a bit once I realize I’ve taken over again.

    Taking a deep breath helps me to slow down my speech if I’m talking to fast.

    Sometimes, I think so fast, my words all get jumbled crash into each other like a train wreck. I have to pause for a second to sort out all my thoughts and get going again.

    Sometimes I’ll lose track of a thought in the middle of a sentence and stare into space for a second or two until I can remember what I was saying. It’s awkward, but I usually give a laugh and move on. I can’t help it, so no sense in dwelling on it. People usually move on, too. Maybe they think I’m weird, but I really don’t care anymore. I’m quirky, can’t help it. Keeps life interesting. It’s part of my charm I guess. 🙂

    Playing with a small fidget in my hand helps me to focus while conversing. I like the bike chain fidget rings, but even a paperclip, quarter, or small piece of paper helps. It can help me feel more in control of my part of the conversation. Instead of interrupting and spitting out all of my thoughts, I put that energy into physical movement with the fidget and toss one or two ideas out when it’s my turn.

    I try to keep conversations in groups short when I can. 5-10 minutes unless we’re subject hopping enough to keep my focus seems to do the trick. Please don’t make me sit and listen to 5 different people’s opinions on one subject. My brain needs more variety to stay on board!

    If I’m going to have a longer conversation one-on-one, I can focus a little better. I try to get a cup of tea or a glass of water, or go for a walk together to give me something to do while listening. Any sort of movement seems helpful.

  • #87854

    Beenie
    Participant

    I feel your pain. I’ve always been like that and it’s frustrating. My thoughts race so far ahead that my mouth can’t keep up and I mix up my words and stumble. I am a combination of inattentive and hyperactive. If there were a magical cure I’d offer it but, sadly, I don’t have one. You are definitely NOT alone!

  • #87864

    jonthegm
    Participant

    Inattentive here, and I do the same thing sometimes. The most helpful things for me are:

    1) in normal conversation, don’t worry about it. No one cares. If they do, they can pound sand.
    2) in a presentation/storytelling setting, plan out what you’re going to say beforehand and practice.

    Some things that helped me that I don’t think are as globally relevant:

    record your voice and get used to how it sounds. Try mimicking voices and intonations and see how that changes how you sound on the recordings.

    Practice speaking mindfully… say each word and follow it out with your mind. Try to gently redirect your thoughts back down to just speaking with when you drift.

  • #87929

    briannebfitness
    Participant

    AHHH YESSSSS it does, do not worry! You are not alone. ADHD people tend to jump around with their thoughts and its like our brain is going to fast!! No worries! I try to take a deep breath and slow down. It takes practice. And my medicine definitively helps

  • #88631

    JimmyE
    Participant

    I’m a 47 year old man from London. The talking fast , being animated , ect …it’s really holding me back ?. I’m the same , I only seem to be able to communicate , on the level that’s in my head with other adhd brains ?.

  • #88675

    JBoom
    Participant

    The above linked articles explain this in more technical ways, but here’s my laymen’s explanation. When I was very young, I was a stutterer. Even once I overcame stuttering, I still have always struggled to verbalize my thoughts (I’m much better at writing them, in fact I’m very good at writing them).

    Whenever asked, I explain it like this: While I’ve never been outwardly hyperactive, my mind is more hyperactive than a kid on a pound of sugar for the first time. It runs at 200mph while my body can only go 55mph. So, my mouth struggles to keep up.

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