Privately diagnosed with ADHD now think husband has it too.

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    • #66745

      I am 53 year old female married to a 64 yr old man. I always felt there was something wrong – hated school, found studying boring and could not concentrate. No confidence with peer groups – made lots of friends but never stayed with same ones. Wanted to stay at home with my family forever but eventually trained as a nurse – gave it up due to lack of confidence, couldn’t concentrate at lectures etc but passed finals then left. Went into social work working with people with learning disabilities (felt I could relate with them) but not so much other staff – couldn’t speak up at meetings etc took promotion to managerial level (against husbands advice) started getting very stressed drank like a fish and ended up resigning. Anyway to cut long story short husband left me and I could not deal with that – in hospital getting detoxes, went to rehab etc. Husband eventually came back and we started taking legal highs (stimulants) I felt like a new person positive, organized loving, enjoyed life, could cope, basically felt normal (not high). Then started going down hill as substances were being replaced and changed. Also at this point I started to feel ill – 4 yrs on have been diagnosed with ME and ADHD by private specialist. After studying, researching, joining groups etc etc I am pretty sure husband has it too but as NHS do not support diagnosis of ADHD in Adults and subsequent treatment we can’t afford to both be seen privately (clinic is 300 miles away and we are not in a position to support this. Not sure what to do or even try and talk to husband about it – he admits he is dyslexic, can get very angry and finds it hard to concentrate and socialize. Any suggestions please.

    • #66795
      Penny Williams

      If he wants to get evaluated and find help, you could work on finding a way to make that happen. If he is closed off to the idea of ADHD, there’s personal work to be done for him, as he has to want help before he can accept it.

      ADDitude Community Moderator, Author & Mentor on Parenting ADHD, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

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