Obsessions

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    • #43676
      PaperBag
      Participant

      I’m 38 with ADHD and for the most part have done pretty well for myself. I pretty much always have an obsession that switches periodically. If I’m kind of between them I get depressed until I find a new thing. I can be anything from video games, stargazing, birdwatching, woodworking… There’s pretty much always something, and it’s pretty much always expensive, lol.

      My current problem is that my latest obsession is Twitch. If you haven’t heard of it, its a website where people watch others play video games on a live stream, and viewers and streamers can interact. I really enjoy watching and have learned I’m a natural at streaming. Streamers are expected to talk constantly, and I’m great at that! 😀 Once a streamer gets a large enough audience, you can actually start making money doing it. The idea that with some work and some time i could play games and talk to people for a living has lit my mind on FIRE.

      I hardly think about or talk about anything else anymore. My work has suffered terribly, as I can no longer focus on it, and no longer want to do it. I NEED my job though. I’m the breadwinner of the house and have to pay the mortgage. I also dont want to force myself to quit Twitch, because it is really fun, I’m making new friends, and it does have potential for me – just not anytime soon.

      I’m taking the next few days off of work to try to push the reset button on my brain, and hopefully be able to re-focus on it when I get back. I’m not so sure it will work.

      Has this happened to anyone else? How do you deal with it?

    • #50273
      Flutterby
      Participant

      I am constantly dealing with a similar issue! I seem to be on an endless loop of obsessions, and also have home and family commitments that prevent me from diving into them fully so they end up petering out within a few weeks or months. In the past 8 months or so I have become enamored with various different creative pursuits that I am 100% convinced (at the time) will somehow lead me to pursue “my true calling” and leave my ho-hum job as an administrative coordinator. These things have included writing (blogs, poetry, fiction), drawing/hand-lettering/illustration, graphic design, launching an Etsy shop of handmade products and even voiceover work. This is all despite having next to zero experience with any of these things. I do think that I have a lot of untapped artistic talents but have never really indulged them, always pursuing jobs and activities because they were safe and didn’t overwhelm me (I’m also a very anxious person). Or I became obsessed with them to an unhealthy level and burned out. Now that I have addressed my anxiety and ADHD I am finally ready to explore things more suited to me, but this comes at a bad time. I have a solid 9-5 job but I am bored and going through the motions, even though my performance is fine. Not stellar, but fine. The thing it, my job makes sense right now for our family and we are planning for a second child so I really do need the paid leave and other benefits the job offers. And since our family is on a tight budget I usually stop myself before spending money on these pursuits, but my usual pattern is to read up obsessively about these fields, listen to podcasts them and talk to others who may have connections. Then someone or something will discourage me from taking anything further, and I give up.

      Right now I am trying to take a break from all this and focus more on spending time with family. But I still try to work “me things” into my everyday routine to keep from getting bored and stir crazy.I.e., I am reading the Harry Potter series for the first time (!) and try to read a chapter every night, and I am constantly listening to new podcasts on my commute that help with quenching my natural curiosity.

      Taking a few days off from work and the streaming might be a good idea, as you mentioned. Maybe some long walks or doing relaxing activities that re-center you and hopefully bring you some sense of control and calm. Good luck!!!

      • #54060
        WilliamThorneWriter
        Participant

        Ah. New fads. Like the song of the lark. Come and go with the seasons.

        I tend to rotate a similar handful rather than find new but I must say the activity you outline strikes me as largely unhealthy.

        Get outside. Move.

        Every blessing.

    • #51255
      Shirokuma
      Participant

      My life is also going from one obsession to another.
      I worked as an EMT, loved it but after 4 years got bored. Then started as train driver, loved it but after 2 years got bored. After that I entered international cargo trains, loved it but after 2 years got bored of it. Now started my own eco-farm but without my wife keeping me focused, I would have also already stopped.
      My mind is now rushing from obsession of farming to full-time RV to becoming firefighter to buying and renovating houses to becoming a gardener,… .
      I learned many languages but after beginning levels I quit because I loose my interests.
      Every time I get an obsession I want to resign my current job and apply at a new one. If my wife is not checking me I manage to waste a full day on watching youtube about that subject and read everything what I can. But after a few weeks I move to the next interests.
      Today I will go again to my psychiatrist (2nd time). Hopefully with treatment I can reduce these obsessions.

    • #55231
      mgrunewald66
      Participant

      I am actually laughing out loud right now!! The post from Shirokuma could have come directly from me. Did this..got bored…I have done many different things and did them well BUT got bored. To me doing the same thing for many years like many many people so actually sounds painful. I just could not do it. Right now I am in the process of becoming.. yep a FIREFIGHTER. I have been drawn to this for years and decided to do it. Maybe it is all the action and excitement. I wonder how many firefighters have ADHD. Your not alone with obsessions. Sometimes I think it is just to keep my mind as bust as possible. Good luck with your challenge.

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