Newly diagnosed son. Feeling scared, sad, worried,overwhelmed. Need supportp

Home Welcome to the ADDitude Forums For Parents Symptoms, Diagnosis & Beyond Newly diagnosed son. Feeling scared, sad, worried,overwhelmed. Need supportp

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    • #179730
      Worried warrior mum

      My 6 year old son got diagnosed with ADHD just before lockdown (in the UK here). Although I have suspected he has ADHD since he was 2 (all the symptoms apply), others told me he was just a very energetic, noisy, demanding child. Then he started school and it became apparent he just couldn’t do things others his age can. Even though I expected it, I still feel really sad and worried. Everything I read (and that’s a LOT) talks about the increased risks of mental health issues, crime, unwanted pregnancies, marital strain, how being a parent of a child with ADHD is more stressful etc etc and now I am so worried for his future and so scared our future is full of struggles. I would really appreciate some insight into what the future holds (I know you can’t predict it of course!). Given he’s so young, is it only going to get harder once he hits puberty? Is primary school a walk in the park compared to secondary school? Where is the good news? There aren’t any parenting support groups near me but I need to speak with someone who gets it. Thanks in advance

    • #179901
      Pedestrian at Best

      Just wanted to post to say you are not alone in feeling like this. I’m also in the UK. My son was diagnosed last December, aged 7. His ADHD is very inattentive, rather than hyperactive, but he does seem immature compared to his peers. It is a lot to take in and it can seem overwhelming. Reading up on it can also be terrifying – like your child is destined to a life of failure, frustration, mental health issues and crime. However, your son is young. You have found out about this very early and (hopefully) before he gets labelled as “that kid” at school. The first time ADHD was mentioned to us was at parents evening (in the school hall). I started cyring. His teachers made the point that it is much better to know about this now, in primary school, rather than having to deal with it in senior school. If he is a bit behind his peers, it doesn’t matter at the age of 6.
      We opted for medication and our school was very good at putting in strategies to help our son focus in class. With lockdown, it is too early to say what is working yet. We have been honest with our son and have tried to explain to him about ADHD. I found a couple of books very useful – “My Brain needs Glasses” by Annick Vincent, and “I have bees in my Brain” by Trish Hammond. You’ll probably find other recommendations on this website.
      I can’t promise you it will all be fine. It will be difficult at times. But he is young and you have time to educate yuourself and your son and to work with the school to help your son to manage his adhd.

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