New Old Person

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    • #101775
      kazjakdude
      Participant

      Hi I joined this site a while ago and then didnt look again. I wish I was dead most days. I used to be okay looking and that got me through but now that Im older uglier fatter( old and fugly is what I call it) life is so very very difficult. I still have no idea about people. They confuse me and I would prefer to see nobody at all if I could. I have a young son though who is autistic spectrum so I keep giving life my best shot and continually fail. I do so want to not be here anymore

    • #101777
      Connerrr
      Participant

      My best advice to you is to understand that everyone fails and those with adhd tend to fail more offen. Someone once told me that the real problem is being able to “focus” on what is going good in life. I’ve wanted to give up many times too but that just a real option because I always see that “light” at the end of the tunnel. Tomorrow may be the best day of your life no one knows that’s why I like to try to keep a positive outlook

    • #101890
      Penny Williams
      Keymaster

      @connerrr is right — your mindset and your thinking plays a big role.

      It sounds like it may be time to consider depression or anxiety in addition to your ADHD. What you describe sounds a lot like social anxiety (I have it and I am super hard on myself, feel like everyone is judging me, and prefer to never be around strangers – which isn’t possible).

      You’re Not Shy or Stuck Up. You Have Social Anxiety Disorder.

      Get an appointment with a therapist or counselor and explore how you’re feeling and options to get on a path of improvement.

      If you ever feel that you may act on the feelings of “ending it,” please reach out to the National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255. They have an online chat option here: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.

      Penny
      ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

    • #101953
      ido
      Participant

      First – you should know that you are not alone.
      Second – in your dark moments, try to ask yourself whether you really cannot do it anymore or you are:
      – hungry
      – tired
      – simply frustrated.
      Frustration is a big one. I know the feeling ….
      Get help if you feel that you are really loosing control.

      If you feel old and fat and whatever – try to do something about it!
      Difficult as it is, start a diet, start exercising.

      JUST DO NOT GIVE UP!

    • #102099
      kazjakdude
      Participant

      Thanks for your replies. It is comforting to know that there are other people out there with the same or similar experiences. I have done counseling with both counselors and psychologistsand have worn out all six or seven that I went to. Was told off by one for being rude. Another one also told me off for apparently being rude or getting it wrong. The others were just exhausted. I dont think I could take that at the moment. Something wrong with the situation when I need to be better BEFORE I see a counselor! (that was meant to be funny). Gotta laugh or I would cry!! Just came back from taking my son (who has ASD-what a combination!!) to his club meeting where the ladies who are part of it do not like me. I spend the time very stressed and embarassed. I try to be helpful but because at the beginning I was myself and was hyper and excited one time and said what I thought was just a joke, the ladies have NEVER forgotten and spend their time punishing me – or thats what it feels like. I, for my part, am as quiet as a mouse, barely daring to speak because I might get it wrong again. This is how all my social interactions go. So at present I am hating all my social situations and am very lonely and depressed. What really gets to me is that I see and hear other people do the same as me and they dont get any negative back. Why is that!! People are so confusing!!!

    • #102109
      strwbry
      Participant

      You sound so much like a friend of mine. He has a lot of trouble dealing with people. They constantly misunderstand him and he gets so angry. He was diagnosed with Aspergers, and since your son has ASD, maybe the reason it isn’t working with the therapists is that they’re dealing with the wrong diagnosis? I’m not a doctor, so I really don’t know. But, maybe revisiting your original diagnosis could be helpful? <3

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