Mom with ADHD! Please Help Me!!!:)

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    • #106040
      MommaC
      Participant

      Hello All,
      So I am a mom of 3 awesome kids (ages 5, 10, & 12), I go to school online full-time, I help run and work for my husband’s business, I also do leather work on the side, and I am on the PTA board at my kids’ school. I am soooo overwhelmed but I keep going. I get distracted, loose track of time, have a hard time remembering things. The list goes on and on. I feel like life is always running around me and I feel like I am not doing much with my children because I feel like I am always cleaning or working or doing school stuff or PTA stuff. On top of everything else, my 12-year-old started a charity for Shriners this year (she is a Shriners kid and went through 2 surgeries and 2 1/2 years of treatment to be able to walk pain free), it is an awesome endevour but tiring for her mom (lol), the nice thing about it is not only is she helping other kids but we get to spend more one on one time together selling her homemade goods at a local vendor market. Does anyone else feel like they are always running with nothing really getting done? This is my first time on this cite and I am excited to find advice. I have bought books on ADHD but I have trouble finishing them….ugh I feel like I am falling down an endless hole. I have been feeling more and more tired lately and I think it is just stress but I couldn’t tell anyone for sure. Please, any advice would be awesome just be gentle with me….I don’t know what to do. My husband wants me to quit PTA but we only have 4 board members (including myself) at a school with over 600 kids in a very low income, rural community so there really isn’t anyone to take my place. Thank you for your help in advance!

    • #106041
      Sam k
      Participant

      Hello and wow you are supermum. I have just been referred to adhd/ asd specialists at the age of 40. I understand now why I have been in a constant state of overwhelm for almost of my life. I have always taken on too much and find I can’t cope, normal everyday interactions and activities send my stress levels of the scale.
      I realised now I need a structured , organised life, keeping a diary, setting alarms on my phone help me with this. I also need a simple life, without unnecessary contact, such as social media, althoguh I do use it as it’s free advertising for my business. I have turned off all notifications on my phone as you will know how easy it is to get distracted. I don’t know if it is possible for you to cut down the level of responsibility you have taken on. I find with adhd / asd I can never do anything to my full ability, which upsets me a great deal, adhd is wanting to but not being able to enjoy anything I do, neurotypicals can juggle all the balls without getting stressed out.
      Make a time table to see at a glance how you are spending your time see if you can give up anything to free some of your time.
      Hope that helps

    • #106076
      Penny Williams
      Keymaster

      I agree that you’ve got to simplify. Stress is very damaging to our health. The more stressed you are, the worse your brain works (especially memory) and the move exhausted you become all the time (not to mention the potential for thyroid issues and a host of other physical issues).

      You just can’t tackle everything all at once. Make a priorities list. Ask yourself some tough questions, like “Is time with my kids or volunteering on the PTA more important?” “Is my health or ______ more important?”

      Your heart is in the right place, but you’re diluting your efforts by trying to do too many things at once — you can’t do well at anything if you’re stretched too thin and stressed out.

      Slow Down and Live Stress-Free

      Penny
      ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

    • #106082
      Sam k
      Participant

      It’s funny you mentione stress as it makes the adhd worse and i think is also a symptom of adhd, we are highly sensitive individuals and find everyday life stressful as it is. So a hectic schedule just makes it worse.
      Also long term stress has made me ill like you mentioned.
      Simple life = manageable life

    • #106117
      MommaC
      Participant

      I have noticed that stress does affect how much my memory messes up. The problem is that we do not have the volunteers to replace me on the PTA or I would gladly step back a little, I cannot stop working for my husband and doing leather work as I need the money to pay bills, I am about a year away from graduating from college with a teaching degree and I know that once I am able to teach I will be able to stop with the PTA (hopefully we will have more moms involved by then) and I won’t have to work in my husband’s shop or do leather work because I will be making a lot more money than I do now. So, once I finish school I will have a much easier schedule/stress level. Until then though….it just feels crazy.

      • #106129
        Penny Williams
        Keymaster

        You have to take care of YOU. Not having enough volunteers on the PTA right now is not your fault and it’s not your responsibility. What is your responsibility is taking care of yourself so you can be what you need to be for yourself and for your family. You’re not doing any service to anything you’re involved in when you’re stressed and frazzled. 😉

        Penny
        ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

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