August 14, 2018 at 5:28 pm #91219goomush210Participant
I am stuck in the mud and have no where else to go to with this really painful disorder. Nearly every day i hurt someones feelings or physical hurt them and it pains me to say that it’s mostly my family that puts up with it. I have trouble talking to people and it doesn’t help me with my therapist being able to try and talk to me. Every time I visit I say the usual. “Everything is going good”. Uuuuuhhhhh I hate myself for always saying that… I am starting high school in 2 weeks and I have not been able to finish the book I was supposed to read and I really hate it but I’m still supposed to do it. Every thing I do is wrong and what everyone thinks of me is also wrong… I cry to myself almost every day thinking about how I won’t succeed in life… Please someone help me… I feel very uncomfortable with every move I make… My parents don’t understand and I never speak up to my therapist about the problems I have to face in my every day life that I have to say is pretty suckish.. I lost hope since 2nd grade… never been the same since then… My self esteem, my courage, and my learning abilities are gone and I am just now starting 9th grade… Can someone please help me understand what my life purpose is and what should I do to get with the program… To me it’s either that or killing myself….. PLEASE HELP ME….
August 14, 2018 at 7:02 pm #91229srterriParticipant
I just read your post and was deeply saddened!
Please, don’t give up! Trust your therapist and the people close to you! Take a deep breath and share your feelings and struggles with your therapist, so he/she can help you.
Here is a phone# 1-877-870-4673 for the Samaritans hot line. Please call!
You will be in my prayers!
August 15, 2018 at 8:17 pm #91310JollyParticipant
I’m really sorry that your going through that, if you need someone to talk to, I am here.
August 15, 2018 at 10:14 pm #91313defiantnotdefficentParticipant
I am very sorry to hear that you are struggling so much. If you were right in front of me I would give you a great big hug. All I can tell you is that it does get better. I do not know if you are taking any medication, but you need to talk to your therapist. I suggest writing a letter to your therapist explaining exactly how you feel. People such as us ( people with severe ADD) are extremely visual people. We need to see things and we communicate very well in the written word. By doing so we can see our feelings be fully manifested and articulated. I suggest the following to make the necessary changes in order for you to feel better:
1. Being to explore your Faith. There is a higher power known as God that can restore you and help you. Never give up on Him, and he will never give up on you!
2. Communicate with your therapist. Writer a letter to your therapist explaining all that is truly going on. Therapists are trained professionals and they are truly want to help people.
3. Assert your desire to see a Psychiatrist. There is a HUGE difference between a Psychiatrist and a Therapist. A psychiatrist administer medication and work with Therapist on the best possible medication for their client.
4. Establish a support system. You cannot overcome this by yourself. It is literally impossible. Reach out and join a support group or an online community like this and try to be involved in a positive reinforced community.
Never give up. NEVER!!
August 17, 2018 at 6:46 am #91390heatherleighklineParticipant
Hey OP. I’m so sorry you’re hurting and overwhelmed. DONT GIVE UP, and don’t believe the lie that you are BROKEN or ALONE. We are your community. We are walking through the same daily difficulties, and we understand how painful and lonely and frustrating it can feel.
Please remember that your family LOVES you and they want to help, even if they don’t understand exactly what you are feeling.
After I was diagnosed I had the same trouble expressing myself, and my mother had a deeply misguided understanding of what ADHD actually is. As I learned more about it, I would send my mom articles and lectures and videos that had helped me understand, and then she was able to see into my world a little more clearly. We began to communicate so much better because I wasn’t ashamed or embarrassed to tell her when i had reached my limit in a stressful conversation, or when I had forgotten to do something.
Just last night, she came into my bedroom to ask a question, and as she was walking out she asked what I was doing (I was sitting on the floor). I burst into tears because I didn’t know! I couldn’t for the life of me remember what I had been about to do. She had come in and asked a simple question, so I had forgotten what I was in the middle of. I just sat there crying And told her i’d Forgotten. Instead of being confused or frustrated by my outburst, she came to sit with me, and APOLOGIZED for distracting me in the middle of a task. She helped me calm down and asked if she should leave or try to help me remember.
That was only able to happen because of an article I had sent her about emotional dysregulation.
I don’t know if that story helped at all, but I sure hope it will at least encourage you, and remind you that you are NOT alone. And we, at least, are here for you, friend.
Reach out on the site if you need to. We’re Here
August 19, 2018 at 2:58 pm #91653goomush210Participant
Thank you for the help. I really appreciate it. I will try to get through this game called life. I have had some difficult times but I hope I can see that there is a purpose for me in life. Thanks to the replies I feel like I am not alone and I have found the courage to tell my therapist what I really think of myself. Thank you guys so much. God bless you all
- This reply was modified 2 years, 3 months ago by goomush210.
August 19, 2018 at 3:15 pm #91656Penny WilliamsKeymaster
There is absolutely a purpose for you! Right now you’re a square peg trying to fit in an inflexible round hole called mass public education. It’s not designed for your success. Do the best you can, but understand that it’s designed for neurotypical students. Talk to the school guidance counselor about your struggles and ask for their suggestions and support. Don’t suffer in silence — they can and should help you.
Find something that you’re good at or passionate about and do it as much as possible. Start finding your successes and it will help you know you have purpose and define that purpose.
ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism
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