I feel useless.

This topic contains 6 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  ADHDmomma 1 week, 1 day ago.

  • Author
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  • #110773

    damnmouse
    Participant

    Well I’ve read that experts caution against disclosing ADHD to supervisors.

    I feel like I have something that makes my work way less valuable as a commodity.

    I have a superior-range IQ and a college degree that took me twice as long to earn as normally required but jobs involving focus, organization, and a good short-term memory are apparently not something I won’t struggle and flounder in.

    I’m really worried about the job I’m in, I have a sense of mortal dread that this is too much for me and continuing to be here will result in everyone frowning upon me.

    I really don’t know what my place in this world is. I don’t know how I could ever respect myself.

    • This topic was modified 1 week, 4 days ago by  damnmouse. Reason: Grammar
  • #110784

    agrooms916
    Participant

    I cant offer you advice as I too am struggling with the same crippling fear of failure and feeling of worthlessness. I commend you for your achievements,be proud of yourself. Any success with ADHD is a success far surpassing those of “normal” people. Know that your past success is proof that you are stronger than your ADHD. Also know that you are not alone in your self-defeating feelings. I share your pain in my life as a housewife. Whether it’s getting the dishes done or thriving in your occupation, ADHD is hard. It makes everything hard and the world is not designed for people like us. But if anyone can overcome their ADHD, you sound like a person who can. Hang in there friend.

    • #110859

      damnmouse
      Participant

      That’s a nice thing to say, your family is lucky to have such a supportive person in you!

  • #110813

    ADHDmomma
    Keymaster

    Fear of failure is tough to break through. Take things one day at a time. How can you succeed today? Then tomorrow, ask yourself the same question. You will actually perform a lot better at your job if you can reduce the stress and anxiety of fearing the worst.

    I know it’s easier said than done, but you can’t get there if you don’t start. Start with small steps each day.

    And add something to your life that makes you feel successful and valuable. You need those “wins” to balance the dread.

    Penny
    ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

    • #110858

      damnmouse
      Participant

      You’re right, thanks, it’s advice I’d give to someone else who is struggling with this. It’s really hard to take my own advice. I’ve got to figure something out though because in six short months my self esteem has gone from healthy to nothing.

    • #111606

      ADHDmomma
      Keymaster

      How can you make sure you start thinking one day at a time? Maybe write a plan of attack each morning? Maybe use a pre-printed daily form like one of these:

      https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01F2Q763U/ref=dp_cerb_1?th=1
      https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07DNW9ZH1/ref=dp_cerb_1?th=1

      Put routines into place that facilitate this perspective each day, so you don’t have to make a decision to do it.

      Penny
      ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

  • #111302

    hjordisaa
    Participant

    I feel you.

    I’m nine months into a job that I still feel new at because I can’t get going. I’m very smart and very personable, with a chemical engineering degree. I know I’m capable but I’m floundering and I feel very guilty for it. I started pursuing diagnosis about 3 months into the job. And here I am. No progress made.

    Everybody says “do something for yourself” but if I’m not thinking about work, I’m fine. I have the ADHD symptoms of course, but my guilt isn’t so present and crippling.

    So I did something for myself and got myself hospitalized because I was so hopeless about this I started thinking dangerously. I did great in the hospital, everybody’s favorite patient. I was happy, I laughed a lot, I wasn’t so hard on myself. Then back to work and I’m back at square one.

    Sorry to pile on 🙁 It’s just so nice that people like you understand.

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