I know there have been many articles about this, but they don’t really answer my current problems.
My daughter (5 years old, awaiting diagnosis) is a delight when we’re out, but at home her meltdowns are increasingly angry and personal. They are usually over things like her not responding to my requests, refusing to cooperate with things like going to bed, coming to eat, etc. It’s often related to being tired or hungry. My mum says I don’t manage them well and I do have a tendency to lose my temper very quickly (I suspect I may have undiagnosed ADHD too) but she makes me so mad! So a- How do I get her to cooperate in doing what’s needed and b- when she stars screaming at me to go away, ‘You’re mean, I hate you’ throwing stuff at me, etc, what do I do? Do you bother disciplining this kind of behaviour because when I try to discuss it afterwards she either ignores me or blames me for being mean.
Any advice welcomed! Thank you.
If being tired and hungry are triggers, start working on those issues. Can you make sure she has a snack high in protein every 3-4 hours? Can you help her sleep better? The only way to change behavior is to address the reasons for the behavior.
Remaining calm is PARAMOUNT to your success with your daughter. The more emotionally intense you get, the more her intensity will flare.