October 8, 2018 at 8:38 pm #101125
It just isn’t fair.
I have no problem chatting with someone or going up to a total stranger and taking to them, when it’s for for business reasons or directions, general day to day stuff.
But if I’m attracted to someone, just the thought of asking if they’re single or asking them out on a date causes a near panic attack, when I could muster the courage to ask someone out I always got rejected, and once I was literally humiliated in front of a hundred plus people, and thanks to the emotional disregulation of ADD, I get to relive those emotions with every bit of intensity.
The feelings and the memories will not fade, and because of that I avoid most all causal situations.
I’m going to end up with a house full of cats, I just know it.
October 10, 2018 at 10:06 am #101216
I’ve always thought, that when it’s the right person and there’s a connection, one of you will approach, even if it’s super hard for you. I know it’s hard, but be as optimistic as possible and it will truly help. 😉
ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism
October 10, 2018 at 2:58 pm #101261
Therapy will help 🙂 I say that from experience. Focusing on being happy with yourself and not worrying so much about what the potential other person thinks. Honestly, you’re probably pretty awesome, and if you like you other people will too. That’s probably why business relationships are so much easier. You’re confident there.
My husband and I became friends before we fell in love. You never know when you’ll naturally find someone you really click with.
November 2, 2018 at 4:56 pm #103144
I will start by saying I completely understand what you mean, and I have often felt the same.
I am single at the moment, had a great relationship and screwed it up! Talked too much, lied when I got bored and now back home with mum!
I agree with penny, I was so scared talking to someone in that way and being rejected again and again makes it difficult but then you meet someone amazing, and the effort is worth it! Don’t give up we all have a lot to offer!
I just wish someone had told me to be myself,go for it and if it doesn’t work to try again and not give up
December 11, 2018 at 1:20 am #105221
Me too. I met this one amazing guy who loved me for me (even though I’m awkward and boring). All the other guys liked me at first then rejected me. The week we hung out it was the happiest week of my life, but he lives in a different state and he went back home to Arizona. I don’t have his number or anything and I never told him how I felt. I’m afraid I’ll never like someone the way I liked him again.
- This reply was modified 6 months ago by dallas825.
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