Does anyone here talk to themselves?

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    • #39883
      Penny Williams

      This discussion was originally started by user ADHDwilliam in ADDitude’s now-retired community. The ADDitude editors have included it here to encourage more discussion.


      and by that I mean Thinking out Loud, saying whatever’s on your mind 24/7 (even in public), but to the casual observer, it can be mistaken for talking to yourself.

      Okay first tl;dr backstory time:
      (you probably won’t read this part anyway, but you totally should)
      I work as a Dishwasher, and I deal with a lot of what y’all seem to like to call “overwhelm” (seen it in a few posts) especially on Sunday’s when it gets REALLY busy which causes Me to get (as one therapist put it) “Keyed-up” and trigger my “self-talk” (notice the quotations)
      <—-end of TLDR back story—->

      (also I’m kinda wishing Firefox would stop crashing on me, right now)

      Anyways the other day at work, it happens, and My Shift Leader (whom I “tolerate”) passes by and tells Me (all pissed off-like, as usual) to shut up and stop talking to myself. (it’s how I concentrate) and I ask Her candidly “do you have a problem with the fact that i ‘talk to myself’, as you like to put it?” and she answers with “If it’s coming from You, then the answer is Yes.”

      WTF? right? I’m a little offended at this point, even though i probably shouldn’t be.

      So then I’m like — “So you have a problem with my disability” and she quickly answers “no”
      and then I’m like — “Well you seem to have a problem with part of it.” and that seemed to shut her up cause she walks off all half-cocked back to whatever she was doing, going on about how she doesn’t care if it offended me.

    • #41046
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      I am really impressed with the fact that you ask questions. That’s not something we typically do very well. However your first two questions were closed ended and allowed her to give you a one word answer. Your next reply “Well you seem to have a problem with part of it.” Was open-ended and you got the desired result of getting her off your back. You have probably noticed that when people are angry you can’t really talk to them because they are not thinking about what you are saying, instead they are thinking about what they’re going to say to you. If you can cultivate those open-ended questions, sometimes you can bring them back to using their thinking process rather than allowing emotions to control what they say. What I just said is true for everyone and it might sound like I am defending your shift leader, but I find her actions, both as a manager and a person to be unprofessional, ignorant, and bitchy. If you can stay in your head and ask those questions you will be able to control that relationship and deal with this “person”.

      I am sure that I talk to myself out loud a lot more than I am aware of because my girlfriend tells me that I do. And you are correct, it is purely a neurological response to stress. You might also want to read up on Tourette’s syndrome because the general knowledge about this condition is typically wrong. Only a tiny fraction of people with Tourette’s blurt out words like you see on TV. I have Tourette’s but it usually doesn’t show up when other people are around.

      Let me know if my advice about open-ended questions pays off in any way.

      I’m also impressed with your acceptance level of your ADHD and who you are, because we have to accept it and be totally okay with it in order to change other people’s minds and educate them about what it really is. That shows a lot of courage.

    • #41047
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user Tim Janke in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      All. The. Time.

      Well, less so now that I have adhd meds (yay pharmaceuticals!), but yeah, I still find myself narrating my life and daydreaming out loud. It’s unusual to get through a whole day without doing it at least a few times.

    • #41048
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user ADHDWilliam in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      I’ve often wondered if it wasn’t a mild form of tourette’s despite being fully aware of it when I do it, however i’ve taken tests before where the results indicate that I might also also have a mild form of Aspergers (on top of my ADHD or Hyperkinesis) and that the “self-talk” might possibly be somehow related to that.

      there’s also a forum post I found about it

      Here are some reason that argue why I it might NOT be tourettes and just simply more a case of being overly talkative or “blurting out”

      Involuntary vocalizations
      I on the other hand am aware that I’m doing WHEN I’m doing and can control it …sometimes.

    • #41049
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user daccim in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      lighten up. when i get noticed, no matter what their tone or actual words are, my standard reply is “of course, i’m the best listener i know”

    • #41050
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user JazzyG in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      I notice it is mostly when a memory of a stressful situation creeps up on me esp if it is something i did wrong…Verbal dumping my thoughts .. I started training myself to say “Jesus Loves Me This I know” instead of what I was actually thinking ( saying I can’t believe I .did/said ….. is less socially acceptable – lol ) If i remember i try to follow it with the thought i forgive myself for whatever was stressing me and most times i can shake it off

    • #41051
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user lise-Mari in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      I totally get this. I talk to myself all the time. It keeps me calm and focused. If I try to think without talking out loud my ADHD kicks in full force and the next thing I know, I’m thinking of an alternative ending to a movie I’ve just seen or something really unproductive like that. So yeah I talk to myself and I am 100% okay with that. If people start asking questions I just tell them I’m talking to God. The reaction is usually them giving me a weird look and walking away. It works for me.

    • #41052
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user MindRepeatingThat? in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      I do this too, especially if I’m extremely stressed out. I work at a carwash, and since all my attention is focused on cleaning and whatever I’m thinking about I tend to forget my other coworkers are around.

    • #41053
      Allison Russo

      This reply was originally posted by user TaraJeff in ADDitude’s now-retired community.

      I tend to talk aloud, not a lot, But i do talk aloud when I am trying get something done in a distracting environment.“Ok, now do this, now this comes next, add this to that divide it by that.” But when I am about to blow my skull angry, and no one is around I will yell out an argument especially if I know how the other person is going to reply. Its good therapy 😀 I always practice what I am going to say to another person in a situation that stresses me out.

    • #43810

      I talk out loud too. My mom used to do it also, having conversations with herself. I do it more when I’m under stress, but I’m also aware that it makes me look mentally ill to anyone who happens to witness it, so I am careful to rein myself in when in an area where someone might overhear me. I don’t know if this is an ADHD-specific trait, or part of another mental disorder. I often wonder if my mom had ADHD. I know she had some OCD going on–repeatedly checking to make sure stove burners were off or doors were locked, saying the words “off” or “locked” repeatedly while doing it.

    • #46746

      I can’t tell you how happy I am to see this! My husband, who has never been diagnosed as having ADD/ADHD but exhibits a number of typical behaviors, talks to himself all the time! It seems to happen most when he’s working in the kitchen (cooking, washing dishes, etc.) (and the kitchen itself is a chaotic mess that he’s created but knows isn’t functional). It also seems to occur more when he’s especially stressed than when he’s calmer.

      I’ve never listened carefully but it typically seems to be whole conversations, or at least one side of them. I’ve asked him repeatedly not to do it, or to be more quietly, since it’s confusing to me if I’m in a nearby room as to whether he’s talking to me or to himself. Now that I know this can be an ADD/ADHD thing, I’ll be able to be a whole lot more tolerant! Thanks!!

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