April 21, 2017 at 2:41 pm #46327
What are the chances my husband also has ADHD?
I have been a stay at home mom for two years now, the house is a disaster and I can’t keep anything in order and there is no routine in our life. I don’t have a system for my children’s things. Its a mess.
I keep thinking, why doesn’t my husband pick up the slack?! I am obviously struggling and I tell him I’m struggling, I was just diagnosed with ADHD, but I have always suspected I have it. So why doesn’t he help me with household duties? I need some help and guidance. If any of this made sense… Haha
April 25, 2017 at 1:28 pm #46677
The possibilities of why he isn’t “picking up the slack” are endless. He could simply be disorganized. He could be tired after work. He could have the misguided assumption that it’s the mom’s/woman’s job. He could be assuming you are working on it since you are at home. He could have ADHD too.
If you want something from someone else, you have to be direct and ask for exactly what you need. Keep emotions (frustration and anger) out of it for the request to be met with acceptance and response. The most effective communication is clear and concise and not fueled by emotion.
Here’s a self-test for your husband to see if ADHD is a possibility:
ADDitude Community Moderator, Author & Mentor on Parenting ADHD, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism
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