Tagged: add adhd
July 30, 2020 at 9:40 pm #180406franbowParticipant
Does this sound like ADHD? For context, I am a 15-year-old girl and I’ve already been in therapy for anxiety, but it wasn’t very helpful to me. My brother is on medication for ADHD as well as my cousin. For these next things, I’m going off a few ADHD checklists I found on some website. I am also using general knowledge and things that my friends with ADHD experience.
I know that being physically hyperactive is a big thing with ADHD. This happens to me sometimes, but not to the point where it is very harmful to me, it’s subtle repetitive movements. Mostly I feel like my mind is very hyperactive. I often am unable to stop talking, thinking, and daydreaming. I can’t stop thinking about things I like (for example, a book ) to the point where I can hardly even get up and eat or do any work. Ever since I was little I would latch onto specific games, TV shows, books, etc, and make them my whole life. Sometimes it lasts for a week and sometimes for months, but it has always been something.
I always get very distracted by bright lights and sounds, and I can hear sounds that most people don’t seem bothered by. I was afraid of the movie theater until I was eleven, and I still don’t like it sometimes, because it’s so loud and there’s nowhere to hide. I like to bring my headphones and play music loudly during the trailers because it’s a lot better if it’s a loud sound I can control.
I don’t know if I get upset more than other people, but maybe I am worse at hiding it. I can’t stop myself from crying, blushing, hyperventilating, or sometimes screaming, as I feel like it’s impossible for me to stop. I saw this on a checklist too, it said “Are your emotions much more intense the week before your period,” and I would say yes. I dread my period because the days before it I feel genuinely awful. I burst out crying in public over tiny things and sometimes I even feel suicidal in a way. I would never do anything because it doesn’t last and I know it’s unreasonable.
I feel like it is hard for me to make a connection with my peers. I feel there is always something I don’t understand that everyone else does. Maybe there is something that I don’t have that they do, or something that I do have that they don’t. I talk to many people and I can put up a front to the world during school, but I barely consider anyone a true friend.
When I get home from school every day I feel mentally and physically exhausted. I do my homework right away before I have time to switch from my “school brain” to my “home brain.” I hardly ever have any homework because I make sure I get done as much as possible during the day, even if I have to cut corners. It is very stressful for me to do schoolwork at home.
This hasn’t been for my whole life, it’s been there ever since I was a preteen. There’s always this dull ache in my head, but it’s not like a regular headache. It’s like a fogginess almost, sometimes it’s worse, but it’s always there. It can make it difficult to do my work or pay attention to anything.
When I’m talking to people, I always make these connections in my head between topics so I will start talking about the new thing I’m thinking of. I hadn’t realized until recently that many people are confused by what I’m talking about because it seems completely unrelated. I don’t interrupt people that much because I am afraid of seeming rude, but I often find it hard to listen if I am waiting to say something.
I have trouble paying attention to the class that I hate, which is math. No matter how hard I try, I can’t make myself focus on it, I can only breeze through the problems without caring if my answers are wrong. It’s easier with English and history because I enjoy those topics. I doodle in every class even if I’m paying attention because it relaxes me.
But, during any test, I usually find that my brain goes blank. I used to study diligently for every test, but I would still forget about 75% of what I learned. Now I hardly study and I remember the same amount. Mostly when I take tests, I’m kind of building off of what I have, making educated guesses, and trying to stretch things about.
For my whole life, it always takes me at least two hours to fall asleep because I can’t “turn my brain off.” It also is very hard for me to get up in the morning, I’m not sure what that has to do with anything but I saw it on a checklist so I figured I would add it.
I can be very forgetful, but luckily it’s not usually with long-term things. It’s more like if my mom tells me to feed the cat, I will forget within a few minutes. I have a lot of alarms on my phone almost every ten minutes of the day, or else I won’t remember to do things. It is also hard for me to remember the due dates for school assignments. It doesn’t matter that much because I get so worried about them being late that I end up rushing and finishing them way before the due date anyway.
I wouldn’t say I’m either organized or disorganized. My room looks clean until you open a drawer. It looks cluttered in there, but I know where things are for the most part.
I often eat to calm down. I know it’s bad but it’s one of those things where I can’t bring myself to stop. I also bite my nails so badly that they bleed, and when the nails are barely there I start chewing at the skin. I do this when I am engaging in something I like and I’m no longer aware of my surroundings.
Sorry, that was long. I have been thinking about this for a while, but I am nervous to bring it up to my parents. Both of my siblings have actual special needs (nonverbal, etc) and I am afraid they will think this is silly compared to what they go through. I just don’t know what is wrong with me and I want concrete answers. I feel sad and frustrated all the time and nothing is helping. I understand that only a professional examination and diagnosis will get me what I need and that talking to people online can only do so much. But I was wondering if it was worth it to look into this. If you read this far, thank you so much.
July 31, 2020 at 10:19 am #180433Penny WilliamsKeymaster
The only way to know if you have ADHD for sure is to be evaluated by a clinician. You can take an online self-test to see if you’re on the right track:
https://www.additudemag.com/adhd-symptoms-test-adults/ (I realize you’re a teen but I think the adult test for doing yourself will be more useful than the test for kids)
ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Coach, Podcaster & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism
July 31, 2020 at 12:44 pm #180476ryotoParticipant
I identify with a lot of what you have listed here as your symptoms.
I am also from a family with quite a few people suffering with a wide range in severity of ASD and AD(H)D and other unrelated conditions.
If you don’t feel like you can confide in a parent at this stage, is there another adult you could talk to? Aunt, Uncle, Teacher older cousins ect who might be able to help you navigate your feelings and concerns?
Alternatively you could ask to speak to your schools Special educational needs department.
If you didn’t want your school to know about your concerns about your self you could always say you just wanted more information to help you under stand your siblings better.
I am waiting for my formal diagnosis (prospered due to Covid) but I have not felt comfortable within my immediate family to discuss it until I have I guess proof because I know I wouldn’t have been taken seriously and if I had been belittled before approaching a doctor about it I probably wouldn’t have gotten as far as I have now in the process.
August 3, 2020 at 5:20 am #180560mazParticipant
OMGGG i was literally in your position at your age. I felt the EXACTT way im not even joking. My brother has hyperactive ADHD soi was soo scaredto let my family know how i feel. And in school i even took his medicine to help and the teachers reffered me to CAMHS and i couldnt even talk about how i felt then becuase my parents where with me and i thought they would laugh and think i do it for attention. so with my queitness and the centres lack of adhd understanding and care they dismissed me without a diagnosis.So i got kicked out of school and couldnt go to school for 2 years so done my gcse at home, which i BARELYYY revised for and now i can get into college. I first opened upto my sister then my mum then the rest of my family and since im speaking about the struggles that they witness of me they understand where im coming from, and i give them some info from the reasearched ive been hyperfocusin on the past year loool.
So yh try speak about the struggles that they also understand, like cleaning your room, i would leave my clean clothes on the floor for a week before folding them and putting it away and in your case is all the clotrhes not organised in your cupboard, explained this to her that it can be becuase of adhd etc.
August 4, 2020 at 2:07 am #180642h_jenny27Participant
i agree! i belive i have ADD but i haven´t been diagnosed yet. However i´ve been educating myself and the more i do, the more i believe i hace ADD. My Theraphist thinks i may have it, so i told my parents about it. They´re health workers but their response was very dissappointing since they think it´s not a big deal but it is a big deal for me, they really don´t know what it is like to deal with ADD when ypu haven´t been diagnosed and aren´t getting any help or treatment.
August 5, 2020 at 12:09 pm #180660Dr. EricParticipant
I agree with Penny.
Especially given that a lot of the symptoms that you are citing overlap a lot with anxiety, it will take some professional effort to see if it is one, the other, or both.
October 5, 2020 at 8:28 pm #184899VerySmashingParticipant
Let’s see… I’m not certain if you DO have ADHD, but there definitely IS something up with your life. It’s definitely not just anxiety.
Since I haven’t introduced myself to anyone yet, I have had ADHD my whole life, but I was diagnosed when I was 9 years old. I am 17 now. I take Concerta, so I am able to control myself physically and mentally enough to function well. Off the meds, I was failing elementary school. With them, I am acing every single HS class I take eheh.
Here are some things I have in common with you when I am off my medication, and it may say ADHD. Although some remind me more of high-functioning Autism. Of course, keep in mind that I’m not a professional and I cannot diagnose you, as well as the fact that ADHD can be slightly different for everyone.
“It’s like a fogginess almost, sometimes it’s worse, but it’s always there. It can make it difficult to do my work or pay attention to anything.”
“I can’t stop myself from crying, blushing, hyperventilating, or sometimes screaming, as I feel like it’s impossible for me to stop.”
“I have trouble paying attention to the class that I hate, which is math. No matter how hard I try, I can’t make myself focus on it, I can only breeze through the problems without caring if my answers are wrong. It’s easier with English and history because I enjoy those topics.” You hit this nail on the head. People seem to think those with ADHD can’t focus on ANYTHING, nah just we can’t usually focus on things we don’t like. Even off my meds, I can draw for up to 8 hours a day because I LIKE doin it.
“I also bite my nails so badly that they bleed, and when the nails are barely there I start chewing at the skin. I do this when I am engaging in something I like and I’m no longer aware of my surroundings.”
“I am afraid they will think this is silly compared to what they go through.” This is NEVER silly, and should not be compared to other’s illnesses. My little sister has moderate to severe Austism, but that does not devalue the importance of my mental illness from being taken care of as well. If you want to feel focused, not be left in the dust by your peers, mocked at less because you are daydreaming too much or that you need to pay MORE attention, you NEED to talk to a professional/your professional about this.
If you already found out that you have ADHD, since this reply was made a little over 2 months since you posted, congrats. You may have found out you have ADHD, but this also means you can start getting help for it. I wish you luck, if so. If not, I would suggest getting friends to ask your parents/help support you, or other family members (aunt’s, uncle’s, etc.) to help. Coming out to my parents about your concerns can be scary. I didn’t tell my family that I was bi until I turned 12 years old, and I’ve been bi my whole life. Once I told them, they were instantly okay with it. Worst case scenario, they tell you no and you wait until you’re 18, at which point you can go and find out for yourself anyways.
October 6, 2020 at 11:10 am #184970franbowParticipant
Hey, thank you to everyone who responded. I told my parents about it and they are supportive and are going to get me to talk to my doctor and therapist about it. The autism thing was also interesting to hear, I never even considered that but it would make sense since my siblings and cousin have it as well. Anyway, I am also going on Zoloft soon for anxiety so maybe that will help as well. I guess I will see what will happen with official diagnoses but either way thanks to everyone for the help.
October 8, 2020 at 12:22 pm #185122VerySmashingParticipant
I’m glad! Keep us updated on your potential diagnosis. Also I’m glad that your parents were supportive.
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