Complete Defiance

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    • #39999
      Penny Williams

      This discussion was originally started by user jen43 in ADDitude’s now-retired community. The ADDitude editors have included it here to encourage more discussion.


      I’m not sure whether I’m asking for advice, or using this as soundboard.

      My 12 year old daughter, who can be the most delightful and loving girl, then, at the flick of a switch, be defiant, abusive and nasty.

      She got diagnosed with ADD in P6 (UK) and generally I manage ok with her behaviour. She takes medication on school days only.

      I don’t need to go into all the details about the difficulties, because all of us parents deal with similar issues on a daily basis.

      But today, for me, has been one of ‘those’ days! She refused to get up for school (normal for us). I can usually get her up and ready, but today was hellish. From her getting dressed, it took me an hour to get her out of the house for school, making her brother late, and me late for work. I confiscated her phone and ipad because she threatened me, “not going to school unless you give me back.” I’ve had the name calling, “go die,” etc, but I’m getting to the end of my patience. Like everyone, I’ve tried many tactics, but I’m fearful about the future, if she’s like this at 12, what will it be like when she’s 15!!

      Any advice would be appreciated.

    • #85442

      I’m sad that nobody has replied to you in 1 year and 1 month!

      I signed up to this site because I have exactly the same issue with my 9 year old girl. It’s the defiance, abusiveness and nastiness – all both physical and emotional. Feeling very, very stuck and really looking for advice that makes sense.

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