Bad telephone conversationalist

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    • #113370

      My ADHD partner is a terrible person to carry on telephone conversations with. He is very chatty, you cannot get a word in edge-wise and he interrupts consistently. And there are consequences for me in talking with him this way. He” have distractions going on around him and his voice will trail off or tune onto someone who is standing beside him and my confusion will read across the phone line as “getting upset”. His reaction: he instantly gets mad at my irritation with the phone call quality, or lack thereof.
      Why aren’t there any resources out there that talk about the challenges of operating over the phone with ADHD partners? Does this not happen to others?

      It’s so hard to deal with him once he’s upset with my lack of patience for this type of behavior. He essentially hangs up, and this is unfair for me. Why should I suffer through his faulty attempts at communication?

    • #117291

      I’m sorry you are going through this! I have found the phone is a problem in my relationship also — instead of talking over me, though, my ADHD partner just starts ignoring our call and starts clicking around eBay or Facebook. Our way around this has been to keep audio-only phone calls to only about 5 minutes, so we end them before his mind wanders. We also use FaceTime or another video calling app as much as possible, since he seems to find those more engaging. And instead of doing calls when we’re apart, we will text photos back and forth to share what we’re doing.

      I realize none of these may work for you, but I hope you and your partner find a method that does!

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