I’ve just been diagnosed now in my mid twenties, and at first I felt I was on cloud 9 because I had finally figured out what was wrong with me (Why I couldn’t focus in school, why I’d space out mid-convo, why I could never get any homework done because I’d zone out every few minutes, etc), I always thought it was just because I was super shy and afraid to ask for help I needed, which is true also (I’m an INFP type personality). After I was tested and diagnosed, I started pouring over old text books and other books I’d left half, even quarter-finished, empowered by the focus my medication gave me. It was awesome. I felt optimistic and confident in my future.
Now, after a few weeks, I’m noticing the happiness has faded, and anxiety is returning as my focus turns inward and begins to analyze my thoughts and feelings with terrifying lucidity.
“You should of gotten this sorted years ago.”
“Where’d all that optimism go? It’s gone. Was it real, or was it just the medicine?”
“You still suck at (random activity)”
I’ve read that self-esteem can really take a beating over the years on people with ADHD, and even after diagnosis, ruminations on past-failures and “What-if’s” can occur.
I’m curious to know what kind of strategies and ways of thinking some of you have used to combat this? 🙂