April 6, 2020 at 4:53 pm #168126thegoodthebadandtheadhdParticipant
Hello fellow sufferers,
I have adhd coupled with anxiety, depression and an ocd like addiction (in my case media – news – addiction) coupled with ruminating thoughts that usually revolve around the topics I obsess about. This often puts me into a highly emotional state, which again reinforces the addiction. I have also used my addiction in the past to escape the present and reality. On the outside I’m quite passive and give up much too easily, and while consuming extreme amounts of media, I don’t post online for fear of rejection, and because I have a hard time to really stay on one topic long enough to bring my thoughts to paper, even if I have already formed them in my mind. My depression is definitely a result of my life not going the way I want it to go, especially the relapse into my addiction is very dishearting. I had some success beating it for a couple of days and weeks, but eventually always fell back. I have decided that I want to try Naltrexone before I take the leap and try anti-depressants, as I believe it’s the lesser evil, comparing the side-effects and that I can get off any time.
I’m prescribed amphetamines and Ritalin, but both don’t really help me. Especially Ritalin tends to increase my anxiety. Recently I have been able to convince my doctor to prescribe Naltrexone, which I have started a few days ago. My interest in it stems from the fact that it is used for alcoholism, opioid addiction and pathological gambling, which shows that it helps with non-substance based addiction. Naltrexone is an ‘opioid antagonist and blocks the positive-reinforcement effects of alcohol and allows the person to stop or reduce drinking’ (thank you wikipedia), but seemingly not only drinking as described. Many people report reduced or no cravings when taking Naltrexone, feeling ‘free’. Some people who took it to treat their alcoholism have described an emotional numbing on it, which is something that emotionally charged people might actually want – dialing down a chronically overused amygdala in a sense. From the reports I could gather online, several who report success with Naltrexone mention that they used drinking to self-medicate against their anxiety, which will sound familiar to many adhd addicts, alcohlics or with a different addiction.
Right now, after having taken it for a few days, I’m positive but not yet completely convinced. I’m still figuring out the right dose and certainly don’t want to give up too early. I started with low-dosing it, but that didn’t really help. I increased and today I took half a pill in the morning (25mg) together with amphetamines and have to say that for a few hours it was almost a revelation. My depression seemed lifted in a way, I felt stable but not a high, and I had good focus. My anxiety came and went, even though I was able to do some work regardless. The anxiety was also mostly related to the most ‘severe’ side effect, which was that I felt extremely cold for some time. Feeling cold for me is usually coupled with feeling somewhat anxious. Later on the cold feeling disappeared. The real positive effect it had, as hoped and intended, was that my ruminating thoughts were almost completely gone and even when they appeard, I wasn’t really emotionally charged by them, and it was easier for me to ‘manipulate’ my own feelings, to calm me down and explain to myself how stupid those thoughts actually are. I felt generally ‘down to earth’, ‘adult’ and ‘no nonsense’. Not happy, but not unhappy. I got a few things done, even though it was not a complete break through, but at least a start. After a few hours the effects wore off, thus I’m planning tomorrow to do two times 25mg.
I’m careful as the first few days positive effects might be placebo, and I don’t want to become enthusiastic as I had that before with other (self-)medication. I’m wondering if someone else has any experiences with Naltrexone. Maybe to treat alcohlism, as it’s not a traditional adhd medication, as the forum search didn’t yield any results. I will try to keep you updated. If you read this and wonder what happend, if I haven’t updated my post you can consider that my treatment with Naltrexone was not successful.
April 7, 2020 at 3:41 pm #168241
giving you a quick update. First of all, some of you may notice I use a different account. I had to create a new one, as I lost my login password. Not that it’s important, just giving you an explanation.
As planned I took two times 25mg Naltrexone, together with my usual amphetamines. Like yesterday I felt somewhat exhausted in the afternoon, and wasn’t really productive, even though I took the extra Naltrexone. My mood fluctuated between dysphoria and actually feeling calm and somewhat relaxed, which I do now (evening). What I forgot to mention yesterday is that the side effects also include that Naltrexone makes me tired. The appetite is also negatively affected for the first few hours after it’s taken.
Generally speaking today went well, even though I’m not entirely convinced (still) that this is what I need. What I would really need is something that gives me the power to just take things head on, as I’m still hesitant to do the things I have pushed down the road. Tomorrow will reveal if it makes me ‘strong enough’, as I have planned to focus on my taxes, which I haven’t done for a while and which give me anxiety when I think about. Let’s see how it goes. I have planned to keep today’s dosis, twice 25mg Naltrexone.
April 13, 2020 at 10:35 am #168711
Couple of days passed, but here I am again. The results are mixed, while I still haven’t done my taxes (see my last post), I have done a few other things and didn’t descend back into my addiction. My cravings are still reduced, while from time to time they crawl back, but I’m in the early stages I guess. A couple of days ago I have decided that I want to make a ‘clean cut’ and to start anew in a few areas. I can’t and won’t clean up everything in my past, but at least I don’t want to create more mess and let things slide.
Yesterday I tried 2x 25mg Naltrexone for the first time (morning and afternoon) and I got a terrible headache. Usually I’m not not susceptible to headaches, but this one was really bad.
Today I’m back at 25mg in the morning and doing well so far. I have also started to microdose psilocybin (magic mushrooms) to improve mood and counter a sometimes dysphoric feeling, and they are doing their job. I’m not taking them together, as I don’t know if they could affect each other. Btw, don’t do what I do, I’m just chronicling my story. Really just take them if they are legal in your area, and if your doctor agrees. For anyone interested, some treatment centers offer them in a few places.
April 15, 2020 at 10:31 pm #169318
Short update for anyone reading this, I’m doing fine, it really seemed to have put me on the right tracks, reduced cravings, but I think it causes insomnia for me. I’m waking up every night and have a hard time to go back to sleep. First I thought this is due to the Corona stress, but I’m not sure anymore. I think I will need to go off for at least a day and see how it goes.
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