July 22, 2018 at 1:38 pm #89080vturner93Participant
I got double diagnosed a couple months ago along with anxiety and depression. I hear a lot that they go hand in hand. My anxiety has gotten really bad lately. I am in grad school currently. I find myself over analyzing social situations a lot. Last week I set up a meeting with one of my professors, just to talk about the assignment. Not that I really needed to, but I feel really supported by this professor. She has gone out of her way to make sure that I am getting what I need with my accommodations. I sent her an email yesterday about the assignment, and received a one line response back with a period, no exclamation mark this time. Which, most likely because she was just answering the question. It did make me feel overly anxious like I did something wrong or she dislikes me. Again, probably in my own head. However, I’m really struggling with how to deal with the anxiety. I definitely want my professors to like me, especially since I have a really hard time talking to classmates. I typically sit by myself and wait until someone comes and talks to me. I don’t have many friends that keep up with me anymore. I think a big part of that is during conversations I dose off and lose focus and find myself not asking much about other peoples lives until after I leave.
This became very long winded I know, but, I’m just very lost right now. Would love some advice or support.
July 22, 2018 at 7:13 pm #89087JBoomParticipant
Over analyzing is my specialty! What I’ve learned over the years is that it can be a wonderful tool when used properly, or a sledge hammer that breaks everything in its path! Communication with others is really where it tends to break down the most. You see, most people are not over-thinkers. In addition to that, there is always tremendous social pressure to under-think things (e.g., just do as you’re told).
A common occurrence for me is writing a 10 page email to someone, only to get a one line response or no response at all. In most cases, it’s not all that personal. Such people are merely overwhelmed by a dump of information they don’t have enough time to process. That is, they have their own personal things to process regarding their life, and they aren’t the prolific over-thinker I am. I’ve found that most people didn’t even read the 10 page email I sent them, they just skimmed it and assumed its general meaning.
So, I started to over-think about how to be more concise. I still overwhelm people, but not so much that they run screaming (at least not as often as used to be the case).
Are you pursuing treatment for your diagnoses? Have you had any success, if so?
July 23, 2018 at 11:01 am #89113Penny WilliamsKeymaster
Social anxiety is super tough (I have it myself). I learned in adulthood that everyone thought I was a snob because I didn’t talk to them, when really I was scared to death to initiate conversation with anyone I wasn’t friends with. It’s really painful, and exhausting, to be so afraid of every interaction.
You’re not alone…
ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism
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