ADHD RSD + Autistic Sensitivities

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    • #126893
      aydeeaitchdee
      Participant

      I have ADHD, intense RSD, and body issues. My partner is autistic and very prone to sensory oversensitivity. Sometimes, my partner will have periods from hours to a few weeks where they just can’t deal with the sensory aspects of affection, so I’m left feeling rejected and ugly. I know that it’s not me that’s the problem, but it hurts so much, especially when it lasts a long time. They’ve never been anything but completely kind and good.

      What can I do to help lessen the devastating, crushing emotional blow of trying to instigate touch and having it gently, respectfully, and compassionately put off for a later time? Is there something I could try asking them to do or something I can do to calm myself down?

    • #126895
      aydeeaitchdee
      Participant

      Oh, and I guess some context: I can’t go on ADHD medication, my partner and I are both 25 and have been dating for nearly 9 years and are getting married next and we have never been more in love.

    • #126928
      Penny Williams
      Keymaster

      You are already respecting your partner’s needs in relation to this and that’s great. The only thing left to do is accept that their withdrawal from physical contact has absolutely nothing to do with you. It’s hard, but you’ll get there in time.

      Penny
      ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism

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