ADHD And Strict Parent

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    • #90304

      Hello guys, I’m new here and I have tons of questions that I hope I don’t forgot to list. I’m 25 years old female, currently pursuing my study in engineering and development.

      First, I think may have ADHD, but when I went to a psychologist she said that I don’t. She said I had a problem with my emotions. Her report wasn’t that clear and thorough because I grew afraid of her assessment and avoided coming back. I was so confused when she said I may not have ADHD, then what I am? And I was also so scared to know the reason behind why my iq dropped drastically when she tested me. My iq goes from 130 something to 108 fyi. Should I come back? Or should I go to a doctor(psychiatric) instead of a psychologist?

      Second, my dad used to be so strict and a harsh typical asian parent when I was a little. Physical punishment was just my usual consumption when I misbehaved. I remember once when he almost push me down the stairs when I tried to fight back. Does this have anything to do at all with my ADHD symptoms when I was a child? Could it be that my fear of getting beaten with my dad’s leather belt suppress the ADHD symptoms that I have? Because the psychologist also interviewed my parents about how I was when I was a little. And she said I show no signs of having ADHD as a child.

      Third, If this is not ADHD then what? I have all what I think I needed to be diagnosed with ADHD. I’m inattentive, impulsive, and my mind could go crazy if I had nothing to think about. I feel like the symptoms are getting worse as my dad strict behavior slackened. I’ve always had my teacher say “You are smart, but lazy.” or “You are smart, but you don’t try hard enough.” And when I was pursuing my bachelor degree my professors has always loved my first design, but then disappointed with how I developed the plan. Oh trust me it’s hard enough to focus when I’m just not interested anymore. And I feel like no one around me understand it. And I feel so bad for disappointing many people who trust me and hoped in me.

      They say your relatives has to have an ADHD to to prove that you might be. But I lived in a third world country that think depression is just because you miss your prayer and forgot about your god. And I might be the first in my whole family (including cousins, uncle, aunt) to tried to go to a professional help for my mental health.

      Fourth, I’m sorry for my bad grammar. I’m not an english speaker. Thankyou for reading and replying. I honestly have more, but I forgot what they are.

    • #90307

      I think it is hard to say without knowing your entire background/symptoms. It sounds like you experienced quite a bit of early trauma as a result of your fathers beating. PTSD can definitely create similar symptoms to adhd.

      I can’t say whether your psychologist is right or not but if you invested so much time in testing why not hear what they have to say. What is their plan for treatment? It sounds like you shut down and may not have been able to process what they were saying. So maybe write down all of your questions and have the psychologist answer them. Also, was the psychologist culturally similar to you? If you do choose a new provider maybe find someone with a culturally similar background who may be more culturally competent (i.e. you wouldn’t know of a family history because there is stigma attached to mental health issues).

      Good luck. I know it’s not easy.

    • #90324

      The field of psychology doesn’t always stick to scientific principles and is thus less reliable in diagnosing medical disorders. And there is a long standing rivalry between psychology and psychiatry. When working with a psychologist, it’s important to know their biases. For example, is this a psychologist who believes ADHD is not a real condition? Or that medication is not needed?

      If you can establish that this person does adhere to scientific principles and is genuinely interested in diagnosing and properly treating ADHD (medication is the first-line treatment, so such a person would refer you to a doctor), then you should ponder the results seriously. Especially if there is a different diagnoses, ponder it. However, as mentioned above, if this person has a different cultural background than you, that could affect the accuracy of the assessment.

      You can always get a second opinion, perhaps from a medical doctor, if you really can’t accept the current assessment (after serious pondering).

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