Reply To: Need help with teenage son!!

Home Welcome to the ADDitude Forums For Parents Teens & Young Adults Need help with teenage son!! Reply To: Need help with teenage son!!

#99493
maxb
Participant

My perspective on this comes from: very late life diagnosis of adhd & diagnosed with anxiety and major depression in early twenties.Raised in a very anti-medication family – chaotic and volatile would be an understatement.I care for kids with adhd and asd in their homes a lot now so see the family dynamics of hundreds of families behind the scenes of their beautifully presented smiling facades.I know lots of people who take incorrect/way too much medication so understand people’s hesitation.

Everyone did their best in my life but without question if I have any resentment/despair/sadness/grief about my younger years it is about my relatives not taking proper medication themselves or giving it to me.I inherited genetic disabilities which have made my life hell.Couldn’t concentrate, dramatically swinging moods wrecked personal school & business opportunities. When I finally took antidepressants in my late twenties I cried a lot because of the previous 15 years where i didn’t feel as calm and settled as I have since then.

When I received my adhd diagnosis and medication at 46 I wept again because of years and years of progressively destroyed self-esteem and inability to function properly. I now see so many kids struggling and screaming and distressed with parents not wanting to medicate them sanely and kindly…and i have to ask”how on earth could you do this to them?” It’s like leaving them with a broken leg …staggering about with no crutches. So I’d give him sensible medication (it may take a few tries to get the correct one) and then time to cool down,calm down (adhd plays havoc with teenage hormones) and learn some boundaries.He’ll survive without hockey for a while…what he won’t survive is an adult life if he’s out of control and so badly behaved that no one wants to be his friend, roommate or employer:-(