Reply To: I'm on diagnosis waiting list, and new to this forum.

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#98246
Verkitso
Participant

I’m also new to the forum, and those two previous posts make a boatload of sense, but there’s one particular comment that really caught my attention.

You refer to yourself as a ‘liability,’ and this is exactly how I’ve come to see myself. It feels as though there’s no situation that I can’t make worse merely by passing through it. I’m a journalist, now working in communications for a big company, so although I don’t have quite the same potential to injure myself or anyone else, the past twenty years of my work history has been one of accidentally offending people, losing jobs that were well within my capabilities and annoying some people to the edge of reason, so while there was the potential there to ‘make something’ of myself, it’s largely been wasted through a million small, bad decisions and weak impulse control.

The other thing you mention is that you have a fiancee. And I don’t think you credit yourself with what an achievement this is. There’s someone who sees the real you and all the things you have to offer, which is a very fine thing indeed. Like my work history, my personal life is littered with broken relationships, relationships that might have had potential had they ever got started and my present partner who I think despairs of me ever getting myself together sufficiently.

Unlike you, I have a diagnosis. The waiting list at the local hospital is a long one, but I’ve been seen by a senior psychiatrist who told me it’s pretty much what I have so I’m here to do some reading and find out what the implications might be, and what medications are available.

Good luck, and perhaps see you around.