You DID get him through. Because of you, he chose a tough path that he felt was right for him and it paid off. Was it a traditional education with the “normal” milestones? No, but that’s ok. The fact that he is 19 and holding down a job and living on his own successfully is HUGE. Way ahead of most kids his age with ADHD. Way. Ahead.
Find a way to show him how proud you are of his accomplishments. Tell him that you recognize his achievements, despite the fact that it wasn’t the path you hoped he’d take. Tell him how proud you are that he took a risk and followed what he felt was best for him and found success because of it.
And, let yourself grieve for prom, graduation, class rings. It’s ok to grieve the loss of the parenthood you dreamed of… as long as you don’t get stuck there.
You’re anything but a failure! 🙂
ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism