Reply To: Repeat third grade for social issues?

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#91924
valkbrown
Participant

We are holding our daughter back this year for 5th grade and we are SO thankful that we are doing that! Our daughter was SUPER young for her grade- late September birthday. When she was in preschool, she was bright and social. It made sense to push her along. But EVERY year the demands get more intense for kids and the social stuff gets harder. This last year, she and her best friend started to drift apart because her friend started getting into pre-teen (harmless and normal) stuff but my daughter still plays with legos, dolls, and pretends. Plus, the anxiety she felt about school demands, mostly due to her ADHD and dygraphia, got worse. She did not like school. So I am actually homeschooling her for the year. We’re calling it a “gap” year and not holding her back. Though the AMAZING thing is that after talking to other parents about our plan, two other families decided to hold back their 5th graders to repeat 5th to give them an extra year to mature! So she is not alone. Ultimately you need to do what is BEST for your child! Don’t let horror stories get in the way of your decision. For mine, her anxiety has almost all but gone away not being in traditional school this year and knowing that she gets a year to “exhale” and not be so stressed. If it were me, I would hold back your child if he is for it. But let’s be clear, he needs to be part of the decision process and you need to be open and flexible to ways of accomplishing that. It may mean going to a different school for a year if that is what you decide together. It also will depend on the school environment or school he attends and if that school will handle it well. My daughter is HAPPY to be repeating. She tells us so. When we started exploring all the options and the benefits she will have from getting an extra year she came on board. EVERY child is different. I wish you luck. It is a HARD decision process! We pondered it for 2 years! But every year it became more and more clear it was right for us.