Reply To: Struggling with motivation, relaxing, and focus

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#90976
UDADD
Participant

I constantly feel like this. I will be trying to relax, watching a movie with my girlfriend and a part of the movie I don’t find interesting will come about and I will look something up on my phone! Even if I find the movie interesting I will look up something they have discussed in the movie that I didn’t quite understand and become an expert on it. The amount of times my girlfriend will say “I wasn’t expecting that” and I will have missed 30 minutes of the movie and not have a clue what is going on. I always think I need to be doing anything other than what I am currently doing. I have a child on the way and I’m undiagnosed and on an 18 month waiting list, but the procrastination and time wasting fills me with so much guilt and regret that it causes me depression and anxiety. I don’t know how I’m going to cope with a baby and show them the right way to live because I don’t have a clue myself. I would go private to speed the process along, but I would feel guilty for using money that could be used to support my girlfriend and baby! The worst thing is that no one in my life seems to understand the struggle I’m going through and I’m good at hiding it, most of the time. So, no, you most definitely aren’t alone! I just wish I could relax and it makes it worse that I can’t sleep when I need to! Feel like I’ve gone off on one ha!