You should not be so hard on yourself. KUDOS to you for being a school teacher. The fact that you made it trough college is something more that a lot us with adhd couldn’t do. You are able to hold down a job that in itself is something I have never been able to do. I agree with the other person who replied to you. You might want talk with your Dr about not lowering your dose just because you are not working for the summer. Maybe try a hobby that you can do with your kids. That might be stimulating and fun. I can relate to the feeling of being useless. I can lie in bed and think about how much I love art, but actually doing it nearly impossible when I just can’t seem to get started.