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Hi Paul, I’m sorry you are going through this but I am so impressed with how well you have been able to analyze and understand the issues and how much you want to make things better. I have a few recommendations: Joining an ADD support group (You will probably feel at home there and you’ll get honest feedback from people who understand you and don’t judge you.) Also, if you can, it would help to videotape or record yourself in social interactions or conversations. Looking at or listening to yourself, might help you see the dynamics of how different elements affect your behavior and thought. Lastly, you may want to consider neurofeedback. This helped my son with anxiety and impulsivity and it has greatly helped him with his confidence in social interactions. He is calmer, happier, more engaged and much less hyper. I wish you the best.