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Thanks all for the positive comments. I think the blog posts I linked to explain a lot of how I got here I think. I eventually had had enough of feeling like this.
I think I’ve always been very aware of stuff around me, including aspects of myself and I think that probably highlighted things to me. I’m also in a fairly switched on, aware role at a company who values well being. We have a mental health meet up, I was trained as a mental health first aider etc etc.
I knew my medication just wasn’t ‘fixing’ me enough and then when I went off sick I’d basically had enough.
As someone who talks openly to people about my mental health, both in work and on Twitter it seemed time to take a stand.