Reply To: Is this caused by ADHD?


Hey there,

This happens to me all the time and it frustrates my work place (AND ME) to know end. In fact, they actually stopped training me on a few things because they got so frustrated with my questions and “making it more complicated then necessary.”

I have done a lot of reflecting on this overtime, wspecially since I was Diagnosed 10 years ago. Here is my personal take on, “needing the whole picture before understanding how all the seemingly different and random marbles of info” connect (This maybe long, but if anyone can relate i hope it provides some validation. Please also note I am typing this on tpuch screen, so spelling/grammer mistakes are going to happen. My appolo1gies to those who have grammatical cringe reflex )

1. I am mainly a “see the forest not the trees” type of person. Details for me are difficult to notice and hone in on, especially when I am situated with in the forest. My 35 years of making mistakes and being penalized has built an overly sensitive need to get it right the first time and because I miss the details leading to mistakes that a true detail-oriented person would notice, understanding more helps me to make to make autonomous decisions with consideration as to how it will faffect everything else. When I dont have a view of the whole forest, the individual trees seem disonnected and I make “very obvious”mistakes due to not thinking with enough circumspection.

2. I cant find the pattern to what appears to be erroneous disconnected info. This especially applies to paperwork. At my job it is crucial to recognize and dedcern documents, identifying what is crucial to support the paperwork and what can get shredded. But the paperwork is never the same because the different avenues that feed into the paper collection are never the same, throwing all the patterns i was trained to find off. Shredding is so final, tbat the thought of making one of my token mistakes by discarding crucial paperwork triggers self doubt. I need to know how to premptovely recognize and descern as many patterns as possible so i dont make a mistake detrimental to the supporting documents. I personally see this as another side affect of my weak detail orriented skills.

3. My questions are many times impulsive, and if i would just give myself a few more minutes I would have noticed the links on my own.

4. I was not offered much leniency in being able to guide my training. I have many years experience working and training to be an educator though I am no longer teaching. But through these experiences I have learned about the diverse ways people learned and was able to validate my need to learn kinesthetically, visually, and one on one. Unfortunately, in the adult world not everyone has had this experience and find it strange and frustrating when i take copious amounts of notes and still return for additional clarification. But, lets be direct. I dont biologically learn like the majority, and so the majority are going to find me frustrating when they train me as though I do. I have started to premptively offer a personal “disclaimer” when I get the sense my question is, “obvious.” These include, “it looks as though I am going to need some hand holding with this,” “may i repeat back what I understood you to mean,” and “may I show you want I already understand about this?” I find that most (not all) recieve my questions with more patience when i do this and it validates those teaching me in that i recognize they have already covered this info. Also, it validates me because it shows that I am paying attention and also lets me guide my learning… which by nature is learn as I go.

I know this is long; thanks for reading. I hope this will offer someone else a bit of validation….