It sounds like he’s struggling with a good bit of anxiety. It’s not that he doesn’t care about you and what you’re saying, it’s that his brain is being hijacked by fear.
Ask his doctor for an SSRi that comes in liquid form – I thought you could get liquid Zoloft, but I’m pretty sure there’s at least one SSRI that has a liquid. They can be very effective for anxiety.
As for sleeping on his own, try baby steps to get there. First, get him out of your bed so that you can sleep comfortably and be rested. Set up a sleeping bag or a cot or something in your room for him.
Remember too, that stimulants can increase anxiety, so that may be part of the cause.
ADDitude Community Moderator, Parenting ADHD Trainer & Author, Mom to teen w/ ADHD, LDs, and autism