I’m glad to hear that you feel relieved by your diagnosis. ADHD can easily be both misdiagnosed and go undiagnosed. I was diagnosed as a child so I have 20+ years of experience with knowing I have the disorder. The hardest part is finding the right treatment. It sounds like you will put in a diligent effort towards that though. I’ve been on every type of ADHD medication there is since the 90s, although for awhile I hated it so much that I took myself off medication for several years (that’s when the downward spiral started).
Because ADHD manifests itself differently for everyone it can be hard to treat. Medication is helpful but its not a cure. I had to completely change my diet, follow a strict sleep hygiene routine, exercise regularly, and use a number of tools to make things a little easier like ordering my groceries online and keeping extra hygiene products literally everywhere (house, car, office, etc).
The best advice I can give you is to take note of EVERYTHING. Journal how you sleep, what you eat/drink, when you take time for yourself, your mood, exercise, etc. I used an app called MoodCast because its simple and easy to quickly track or make notes about everything. Then treat ALL the symptoms! Make sure there’s nothing that is getting in the way of alleviating your ADHD symptoms; i.e. caffeine late in the day = trouble falling asleep, lack of sleep = lack of concentration and moodiness, stress from work = stress at home.
It’s not that those things aren’t due to your ADHD, its that because you can’t cure ADHD you need to cope with it the best you can, and those extra changes are small but mighty.
A big misconception is that poor performance in school automatically equals ADHD or vice versa. It’s also a misconception that you would be horrible at you job or unorganized. However, I can see from your experience, which is a lot like mine, that you found a way to make it work. The idea that we can’t figure it out or be successful or even happy is a lie. We work very passionately and are determined to be great, and I believe that because its so much harder for us is exactly the reason a lot of us ADHD adults make great employees. We already know all about hard work because everything is hard. 🙂
Kudos to your wife for being so supportive. The relationship selection of this site has been an answer to my prayers! It’s not easy loving someone with ADHD but it sounds like you found the pearl in the ocean.
Good luck with your treatment!